Whether it may be your first day in school, a job interview, your starting date with your new job, or even at random parties, getting to know people and making them comfortable around you seems to be difficult, others might even find themselves in very awkward situations. Although there are people who are naturally gifted and can get along extremely well with just about anyone in an instant, sadly there are also some who struggle with expressing themselves. There is nothing wrong with being a bit shy and nervous the first time that you talk with a random stranger however, there are some cases when you really have to do well with first encounters like when applying for a job, or even when you’re trying to impress someone that you like. But what really is the first impression and why do impressions matter?
good impression killer first impression
The way people act and how they treat you is crucially linked to their first impression of you. In Psychology, a first impression is defined as the event in which one person first encounters another person, and forms a mental image of that person. That “mental image” will have drastic effects on the path of relationship that you’re trying to build with others, whether it may be professional, friendly, or intimate, how they felt about you the first time you’ve met will be a big help if you want a good and long-lasting relationship. It is true that we need to be a hundred percent genuine at all times with our personality but if you feel that it seems to make people act uneasy around you then it’s wiser to make a change for the better right from the start. So here is the list on how to avoid a negative first impression and build a better you through first impressions.
Here are some tips on how you can make good first impressions
Call Them by Their Names
Name card
Make your conversations more personal and sincere by calling people by their names. Repeatedly saying the name of the person you’re talking to will make them feel that you're paying attention. It gives a positive impression that you’re highly interested and wants to connect with them better. This, of course, depends as well on the person that you are trying to start a conversation with because in some cases, others would prefer that you address them in a more polite or formal manner so it’s best for you to ask first if it’s okay for you to call them casually by their names just to be safe.
Give Compliments to Others
Complement
Speaking so kindly and highly of another will make people admire you and give a positive first impression. It has never been difficult to display a positive and healthy attitude and most of the time whenever you compliment others, they would often associate the good things that you say to yourself and in turn, you will be shed in a positive light. The good that you give to others will return to you a hundredfold. The next time you’ve met someone that you have a mutual friend with perhaps, just refrain from giving any negative comments whatsoever, even if you actually hate the person because it might get back to you one way or another.
Make Good Eye Contact
They say that the eyes are the windows to the soul and I think that we can all agree with that. Sometimes all it takes is to look at someone’s eyes to know what they really feel. As funny as it sounds, maintaining eye contact can be challenging but it’s a must if you want to establish a good connection with the person you are talking to. Looking at people's eyes will also give you a hint on how they respond to your actions, and therefore will give you awareness of how to make your first conversation shift in the right direction. Avoiding their gaze would often make them feel that you’re not that engaged with the conversation so always make sure to make eye contact every now and then just to appear a bit more intrigued and genuine. Making eye contact also
Smile More Often
Smiling v2
Smiling will make the people you’re speaking to feel more comfortable around you. When you meet someone, smile with a firm handshake. It will make you appear friendly, joyful, and easy to get along with. Lighten up the mood and release the tension of your first meetups by simply giving a carefree genuine smile and laughing at the simple jokes even if it’s not funny. On top of that make sure that you sound excited as well, it’s not enough to just smile, you must act as if it’s the best conversation that you’ve had in a while. As they say, smiling is contagious so make the initial impressions an unforgettable and happy experience.
Show the Clumsy Sides
Believe it or not but your lack of grace might end up helping you get along well with others. Perfection dehumanizes a person because let's be honest, nobody is really perfect and everyone makes mistakes. You don’t have to pretend like you know a lot of things, have strong body language or that you have a lot of skills to be likable. When meeting people for the first time, it’s best to be casual and show that you’re just a regular person that makes mistakes so they can relate to you better. Show that you’re clumsy every once in a while but of course also show that you’re capable and intelligent so that you will appear reliable, fun, and relatable.
In conclusion, becoming a better person requires a few tweaks and adjustments. The saying “just be yourself” is not always applicable simply because society has a standard that should be met that defines whether you’re pleasant or not. Making a change to become better is ideal, it will lead to successful careers and long-lasting relationships and if we’re really aiming for those, we should begin in the right way. If it’s worth doing then it’s worth doing right. Give importance to first impressions and make it a key to becoming a highly likable person!