12 Bad Customers You Will Regularly Encounter While Working Instacart In San Francisco

Working Instacart in San Francisco sucks and these customers don't make it any better.

It will be apparent within your first few shifts the types of inconsiderate customers you will inevitably encounter during your grueling shifts.

Instacart is an application platform that provides on-demand grocery deliver service.
As an Instacart Shopper, you will shop for groceries and drop it off at the customer’s location.

As if navigating the insane traffic, parking, and congestion of San Francsico wasn’t difficult enough already, along with the stress of Instacart constantly riding your ass by pitting you against the clock on your deliveries, these inconsiderate customers put ZERO thought into how they’re cluelessly making your job and life even more of a pain in the ass.

Even worse is these customers are not limited to one particular type and can be a combination of the following:

1. Buzzkill
   This customer leaves no buzzer instruction at the panel so you have to scroll through the entire directory. Their apartment number has no correlation to their directory listing so you'll be wasting valuable time scrolling with no starting reference point. An even worse variant of the Buzzkill is the customer who has NO buzzer panel and NO dropoff instructions as if you were going to somehow magic your way through the door. Open Sesame!

2. MIA
   After going through all the trouble of finding this customer’s place in a city where everything is hidden in a nook and cranny, you arrive to find that they're not even home.
   They leave no instructions to leave the items so, per Instacart’s policy, you're obligated to wait there until you either:
   a) finally reach the customer for further instruction
   b) the ten-minute missing customer countdown in the app runs down.
   In case you're wondering, the answer is yes, your customer making you late affects your performance rating in the eyes of Instacart. You had better hope that this customer doesn’t answer the phone because the MIA will insists that you sit and wait longer than the ten-minute countdown for them to come home.

3. Snailpacer
   Unlike the MIA, the Snailpacer actually is home! He just takes sweet sweet forever to answer the door, with no consideration that he is messing with your speed metrics and schedule for other deliveries, and is therefore messing with your earnings!

4. Bait-and-switch
   Once again, you’ve finally arrived to the customer’s location after cutting through the madness of this city. After securing parking, unloading the bags, and walking towards their steps, you get a last minute text from this jerk giving you a different delivery address (across town). Now you’re cutting into the delivery time for the rest of your orders and you have to start the process all over again: load your car, drive through madness, secure parking, unload the bags, and, finally, play the Labyrinth King’s game. Be sure to call Shopper Support to get an extra pay bump as this customer is likely not the type that will tip you for your extra efforts.

5. Labyrinth King
   This customer leaves you little to no instructions in finding their place within the complex. Being the royal scumbag that he is, he’ll put you to the task of navigating blindly through his elaborate maze, transferring elevators, and/or locating a particular door with another set of access codes. After that whole ordeal, you still have to grit your teeth, force a smile, and pleasantly say thank you to the Labyrinth King. Kiss the rings, bitch.

6. Toll Booth
   Adopting ruthless parking practices is just a part of the job if you hope to have any chance of making your deliveries on time while doing Instacart in San Francisco. However, sometimes even illegal parking isn’t available on the many busy thoroughfares in SF, and you’re left with no choice but to use the only parking available to access the Toll Booth’s location; the paid parking garage. Don’t be surprised the parking fee will cost more than how much you earn for this delivery. Congratulations, you just paid to do free work.

7. Stairmaster 5000
   This customer lives up several flights of stairs with no elevator in the building. Its obvious the Stairmaster 5000 uses Instacart just so they don’t have to carry those loads of groceries up all those stairs themselves. To make the best use of the Instacart service, they figured they’ll stock up in one fell swoop. So be prepared to take several trips up and down the same flight of stairs. The positive here is you basically completed a stepmill session at the gym.

8. Drill Sergeant.
   This customer is usually located in the heart of a complex where parking is further away and access to their location is a trek. Like the Stairmaster 5000, the Drill Sergeant is likely using the service not merely because shopping is a chore, but is rather unwilling to do the long haul himself. So throw that 50 pound pack on your back and get on with that long hike. While you're at it, you might as well chant some military cadence songs.

9. Dockblock
   Wow, there is a loading dock hidden in the back of the building that conveniently gives you access to the elevators as well!? How wonderful! Absolutely splendid because the Dockblock will not be giving you this piece of critical information. Instead you will risk a parking ticket parking while parked in a very questionable spot just to faithfully carry out your duties as an Instacart Shopper. Expect to encounter the Dockblock in the Financial District.

10. Closet Case
    This customer wants you to stash their items in a non-obvious closet, nook, or cranny eventhough they give you unclear dropoff instructions. Being the diligent Shopper that you are, you call and ask for clarification. As a reward for your thoroughness you hear the most condesending tone on the other end as if you're a nuisance and an inconvenience upon their existence.

11. Game Show Host
    What's behind door number 3? With the Game Show Host, you’ll practically feel like you’re a contestant on Let’s Make a Deal. This customer gives you an address with just one number off. To complete this delivery you will be searching around the neighborhood, punching in the provided door code until one matches up to their drop off instructions. While feeling good about yourself and your powers of deductive reasoning, you unfortunately will not be winning that brand new car when you guess the right door.

12. Algebra Teacher
    Here is another opportunity to exercise your powers of deductive reasoning. The Algebra Teacher will make you feel like you’re solving for X, just like in high school Algebra! His building itself has no visible number anywhere in sight. So, with grocery bags in hand, you start cross referencing the numbers of all the other buildings in the neighborhood until you finally determine you’re at the right address. Here the work itself is the reward. Don’t be expecting any extra credit points in the form of tips or additional gratitude.