Intro

I'm older than your dreams my height is 5'7 1/2 my shoe size is 7/8 my measurements are 34/23/34 I have almost died three times. One was a car accident, one was an overdose, one was drowning. My favorite color is black, some of the most inspiring people to me are Rowland S Howard, Sylvia Plath, David Lynch, amongst many many more. Some of my favorite stories are by Hans Christian Anderson. Some of my favorite movies are the lovers on the bridge, the girl on the bridge, wild at heart, island of doctor Moreau, cat people, the little prince. I've seen a pink ghost at age 7. I like to write poetry, I like to eat desserts, and I like to dance; and I love to be in love. I believe in love as an illusion of freedom in this world where everyone lives in 100 dreams in the same day. Till not even one is true. I believe in being fearless. I believe in unbreakable love. I believe the parody of celebrity and the contradiction of peace and war. I believe in our breaking hearts that fill all the glassy screens and parties when we are diluted friction. We are living contradiction. I adore my idols but I wish not to ever be as any of them. I like the story of Henry Darger, I like Chet Baker, Neruda, and Hunter S Thompson, my favorite Ginsberg poem might be America. I don't mind working for something that I think is a possibility, I am a terrible liar. I am the best friend one could have I'll always be there if someone's true. I've met many important people, I've had dinner with Prince before his death. I love traveling, I've lived all over the world one of my favorite places was Berlin.. I made my first poetry visuals and short movie there. I will also always remember Amsterdam and the time I made a custom burger in Burger King at night that was better than the ones here. I'll also remember the rain, the bikes, my face on the rooftop of the shoot for zoo magazine. I'll also remember Berlin the first time I came I felt so odd and so lonely everything looked so quiet I landed a big shoot for tip magazine and my billboard was all over town. I'll remember meeting mudhoney backstage in my purple satin blouse while my bf said I was his wife and we were engaged. I'll remember NY and the 60's guitar I got, I'll remember the places the streets I kissed and loved and disappeared in tears with all over the world. I'll remember to never fear things I desire. I'll remember to let myself become all that is simple as the neck of a rose that breaks without remorse. I like expensive things like many people but I also don't need as much as I have. Happiness is my greatest goal, I feel I've been born blue since age 3 and my uncle that died in the former Yugoslavian war bought me a blue bear from a stand because the color to me was beautiful I still have it.. it has a red polka dot bow. I'm Croatian/German. My father is a professor and worked in parliament when in his country.. my mother studied as a lawyer. My mother has a weird heart, last year was weird for me. I saw lots of blood. When we see blood of people we love we understand nothing is forever at that moment more so then anything. I broke my nose about 6 times in my life. I have anxiety and insomnia, I don't take my problems out on others; Knowing that each person has their own demons. I did ballet many years I'm still very flexible. When I was little I went to a party at a European presidents house and fell in love with a little boy I would bring him cakes. I was only around 5 years old visiting for the first time. I'm raised in Seattle. My hair is brown. I don't believe much in people but I try. And every time we talk about ourselves how much is still unknown.