Daily Jokes from SydesJokes for 16 Oct 2017

Joke 1

Protecting Bitcoin

SydesJokes Daily Digest

Original post: http://csyd.es/1/74

Joke 2

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. - Albert Einstein

Joke 3

A rope goes into a diner and orders lunch. The waitress says, "Hey! Aren't you a rope?! We don't serve ropes here!"

The rope replies, "No! I'm a frayed knot ..."

Joke 4

Q: Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?
A: He had no patients.

Joke 5

A woman visited a modern-art gallery. One painting was bright blue with vivid orange swirls and the one hanging next to it was black with lime-green splotches.

The artist stood nearby, so as politely as she could, the woman said to him, "I'm sorry, but I just don't understand you paintings."

"I paint what I feel inside me," the artist replied.

"I see," the woman replied innocently. "Have you tried Alka-Seltzer?"

Joke 6

A worried father telephoned his family doctor and said that he was afraid that his teenage son had come down with V.D. "He says he hasn't had sex with anyone but the maid, so it has to be her."

Don't worry so much, advised the doctor. "These things happen."

I know, doctor, said the father, "but I have to admit that I've been sleeping with the maid also.I seem to have the same symptoms."

That's unfortunate.

Not only that, I think I've passed it to my wife.

Oh crap, said the doc, "That means we all have it."

Joke 7

An older couple is lying in bed one morning, having just awakened from a good night's sleep. He takes her hand and she responds, "Don't touch me."

"Why not?" he asks.

She answers back, "Because I'm dead."

The husband says, "What are you talking about? We're both lying here in bed together and talking to one another."

She says, "No, I'm definitely dead."

He insists, "You're not dead. What in the world makes you think you're dead?" "Because I woke up this morning and nothing hurts."