A kind and loving devotee message:
We are all struggling and you are not alone. Hang in there and never forget that you are loved and precious. I remember when I use to work in a office and everyday was a struggle from all the stress (I worked in finance) , I would sit at my desk and listen to you read Nectar of Devotion on tube and it was such a blessing. You got this 💓
My response
I think it is something like taking the air out of a balloon. Reducing the false ego. We are resilient. We cannot die although sometimes it feels like it. Stretched beyond what can be imagined. Thank you for your kind words of support. These dark times are the best. Maybe it is spiritual Stockholm syndrome. ❤
Note: After finding Srila Gaurahari Das online in live sessions in 2013 I developed a very strong taste for hearing and chanting. I couldn't stop actually. I began reading and recording everything Vaishnava I could find. (Might as well record since maybe someone would hear something.) It was a reading and recording marathon. I read and recorded Krishna Book (twice,) Nectar of Devotion, Chaitanya Charitamrta.. Chapter 7 , several of the Gaudiya Vaishnava Acharyas books and essays, Bhagavatam up to the end of Canto 4.
During the day different melodies and tunes of the Mahamantra would appear in my heart and I would record them also. Over 150 distinctly different melodies.
