The Spotlight Effect: Why No One Cares About That Thing You Did

in life-mindset •  5 years ago 

Ever had the feeling like you were being watched?

You were super nervous to go into the networking event because you felt like all eyes were going to be on you.

And now that you are in the event, all the smiling faces looks like they are hiding their real intentions.

You think they are thinking about you.

Judging you.

This causes you to display weighted body language.

You overthink every move & try to shoo off the enemies.

But the funny thing?

Other people are doing the same thing.

Yep. This phenomena is known as the 'Spotlight Effect.'

The spotlight effect is a psychological illusion that makes you believe there is a figurative spotlight on you as you go about your day.

This typically occurs in social events.

The question is why?

It's because of the human ego.

The human ego makes us view ourselves as the main character of our story.

This leads us to enter different venues thinking that we are serving as the main character of the event.

But the reality is that other people feel the same way.

They are the main character of their stories as well.

You are nothing more than an extra in their world.

But to seal this concept further, understand this.

Your WORST problem will not be registered as more important than their most MINUSCULE problem.

Example:

Say you totaled your car & you tell Billy about it. Billy will feel very sad, then go back to his every day life. His mind will refocus from your car to how angry he is at his dog for shitting on the carpet.

This isn't to be morbid, but to be real.

Your problem is mainly a problem to you. But for the other person? You are an extra. A peasant. They are the king of their kingdom. Therefore, they will allocate their mental bandwidth to their issues.

This concept should strangely make you feel liberated.

It's one of those concepts when FULLY internalized will melt social anxiety for good.

But our ego hates internalizing this concept.

'What do you mean I am not the main character in someone else's world??' the ego yells.

This is where you begin reconditioning your mind with rationale.

The untamed ego cannot even spell rationale.

But the tamed ego sure can.

The next time you are about to enter a social event & you feel like all eyes are going to be on you, RECALL THE SPOTLIGHT EFFECT.

Use your rationale.

All the other people are worried about what sort of impression they are going to make.

But now you are equipped with this knowledge to maneuver around the notion that you're the main character of someone else's life.

And this realization will have you feeling more bold & powerful than ever.

I discuss more social dynamics principles in my new book: Power Up Mentality.

Heck, I have a whole chapter dedicated to it!

Make sure you read it so you can Power up your
SteemPower, mind & social intelligence along the way.

Confidence awaits.

Mr. Power Up ⚡

Authors get paid when people like you upvote their post.
If you enjoyed what you read here, create your account today and start earning FREE STEEM!
Sort Order:  

You got a 11.49% upvote from @joeparys! Thank you for your support of our services. To continue your support, please follow and delegate Steem power to @joeparys for daily steem and steem dollar payouts!