What is love?
The definition of love is relatively large. From the object of love, there are love, family, friendship and so on; from the nature of love, there are selfish, selfless differences, as well as shallow, length differences and so on. The love advocated by Buddhism is compassion and love. We hope that the other side will not suffer any pain and have more happiness. And its objects include all sentient beings, including humans, including animals and even ghosts and gods.
This kind of compassion comes from deep understanding and acceptance. Being aware that oneself and all beings are one and sharing the suffering of all beings, one will help one another unconditionally and unreservedly. At the same time, this kind of compassion is not sticky. It is the heart of the people who has nothing to gain. I have no sense of superiority in helping others, nor do I have the idea that my partner can get help from me.
And the love of ordinary people often comes from persistence and possession, selfish and narrow. This will require and even kidnap the other side in the name of love, for example, "I'm all for you." "I love you so much, do you..." "I have paid so much for you, you unexpectedly..." It takes all kinds of entanglements, even unbearable pain, to get what we want.
If we want love without pain and side effects, we must sublimate small love into great love, and turn selfish, gainful possession into selfless, gainless compassion.