A Birthday Observation - and a Passage

It's August 6th, 2017. 

Had he still been alive, we would have celebrated my father's 99th birthday today. 

I have good memories of my dad's past birthdays, as it seemed to be one of the very few occasions for which he allowed himself to relax and simply be human.

Since August 6th was still during school summer break in Denmark, we'd typically take several days and spend them at my Aunt's summerhouse, sometimes with an extended group of family members and friends. 

A Birthday Festival of Food!

The day itself always seemed to unfold much the same-- year after year-- and festivities always revolved around food... which has been a typical thing in my family for as long as I can remember.

We'd start they day off with a vast volume and variety of fresh baked goods procured from the local bakery... then it was off to the nearby town which had an active fishing industry. Here, we'd head down to the harbor and get my dad's favorite food: fresh lobster. Of course, that was just part of the picture... we also would pick up freshly smoked herring, mackerel and sometimes salmon. The former was for dinner... the latter for lunch.

After coming back with the fish, a huge lunch of sandwiches, smoked fish and all sorts of other delicacies would be offered up, and we'd all stuff ourselves again... most of the adults "lubricating" their lunch with some good aquavit and beer.

We'd take maybe an hour of rest to let lunch settle, and then we'd be on the move again. 

This time, some of us would get on our bicycles for a short ride to the nearby woods to pick mushrooms (No, not THAT kind of mushrooms! These were chanterelles), while others would roam the 12-acre property to pick wild berries-- usually raspberries, gooseberries and the very beginning of blackberries. I usually went with the mushroom crew as I was really good at finding things.

By the time we'd make it back to the house after many miles of walking, we'd usually worked up a pretty good appetite for dinner of lobster, followed by pork tenderloins with chanterelle cream sauce, and new potatoes and vegetables from the garden... and then my aunt's famous birthday cake, which I am-- to this day-- still trying to emulate.

An Old Fashioned Tradition... Ended too Soon

I remember those summer days as being unusually peaceful. Somehow, a family that wasn't otherwise very close would put aside its differences and just relax over lots of superb food and drink.

And everybody seemed to authentically enjoy themselves.

Maybe it was a very "old fashioned" way to celebrate... acting like "gentry" with fancy food, rather that actually doing anything particularly "fun" or "celebratory."

I am not quite sure why-- of a large family-- it was my father's birthday that warranted such special attention and expense. I can only surmise that it was largely because the time of the year was near perfect in Denmark... it was the warmest part of the year, as well as the time we were most likely to have sunny days and a bounty of food from the sea, forest and garden.

As it turned out, my father died of stroke, some four weeks after my 18th birthday.

And so, that's where the memory ends... somehow, no other family celebrations slid in to take over the hole left by his absence. A couple of years later, I went to the US to attend University... and never returned permanently to Denmark. Sure, I have often gone back for vacations... but somehow it's "not quite the same."

In retrospect, maybe things turned out exactly as they were supposed to. My dad was a vigorous and energetic man, and I don't think he would have dealt well with "being old." In conversations with my mom, she mostly agreed.

Anyway, this memory is for my dad, wherever he might be. I think some part of him would be happy that we still have the house that gave rise to many happy times.

Happy Birthday, Dad!

How About You? Do you have any particularly strong or vivid memories of family festivities from when you were young? Family traditions, perhaps? Are they still going on? Have you created any new family traditions? Leave a comment-- share your experiences and feedback-- be part of the conversation!

Side note: All images in this essay were taken at my aunt's summerhouse where these celebrations took place. The property is still in the family, now owned by my cousins.

(As usual, all text and images by the author, unless otherwise credited. This is original content, created expressly for Steemit)
Published 20170806 17:26 PDT