Houseguests!

in life •  8 years ago 

We've recently had people staying at our house-- a couple of friends who were heading out for a long camping trip stayed a few days "on their way out" and a few days again "on their way back in.

WhiteHawthorn
Blossoming white hawthorn

Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy having friends come to visit as much as the next person, but there is something "disturbing" about having someone else living in the house, no matter how temporary, or how unobtrusive the guests may be. I don't mean "disturbing" in a distressful way... just in the way it causes our typical daily routine to go out the window.

Sensitivity... and Visitors

My wife and I are both highly sensitive people ( I previously wrote an article about it here on Steemit ) and we are both very tuned in to the energy of other people. Having someone else in the house isn't exactly a problem, but we're both constantly "aware" that someone else is here.

I once ran across a saying that went something like "House guests are a bit like fish-- they start smelling bad after three days."

Wallflowers
Purple Wallflowers

Maybe that doesn't sound very kind or hospitable, but I can totally understand why someone would have coined that phrase. And I say this, even while I can also say that the guys who was staying with us are very nice and not particularly demanding.

Maybe it's also an extension of getting older; now we are in our 50s we seem to have grown more attached to having things our way, and we like to follow our routines as we've learned they fit us best. I say this... but yet I also remember quickly growing tired of having friends stay, even when I was in my 20's.

Peace, Again...

I took our friends to the bus station, yesterday, after they'd spent their last three days with us. Even though there was a slight sadness at the time of departure, my wife and I looked at each other once I was back home and agreed that we were very relieved to see our visitors leave, and happy to "have our house back."

GreenFrog
A peaceful green frog

I suppose there are ultimately upsides and downsides to having house guests-- just like there are to most things in life. 

We did have some fun times, and we went out and "did things" far more than we usually do. It was a chance to "play tourists" in our own town-- something we (and most people) rarely do. We got to have interesting conversations and discussions we wouldn't otherwise have had (our friends are basically "Eco-Anarchists"), and we got to swap stories from the last few years. On the other hand, we're tired, and in need of actually having a good night's sleep. And now there's a HUGE backlog of work we both need to catch up with-- we both work (mostly) from home. 

How about YOU? How do you feel about having house guests? Does it wear thin quickly, or do you enjoy the change of having someone new around? Does it depend on the person, or persons? If someone is visiting, would you prefer they stay at a nearby hotel or inn? Do houseguests sound fun "in theory" but turn out to be a pain "in reality?" Leave a comment-- share your experiences-- start the conversation!

(As usual, all text and images by the author, unless otherwise credited. This is original content, created expressly for Steemit)

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Wow, I actually loved being a guest in my early 20s. It was almost a hobby of sorts. Most of my friends didn't like travelling, so they were always inviting me to come over. These days we have all turned 30 and somehow hosting and being hosted became not as fun as it used to be :) When it comes to hosting guests myself, it really depends on the person who is coming to visit. Some are wonderful and I wish they'd move in, others I wouldn't want to see for some years after the visit. Go figure :)

I guess we just change... and for many, when we get to our 30's we're also more likely to have kids in the house and guests doesn't mean a "fun free-for-all" anymore because we're pretty busy keeping up with the kids' routines and school and stuff.

I feel very uncomfortable with house guests. Even more uncomfortable if I am someone else's house guest. I just don't feel like I'm free in my own home when we have guests sleeping over.

Precisely! And even when we're invited places, we often make arrangements to stay at a nearby hotel rather than being a houseguest... unless it's with someone whose home and routines we know really well.

Yeah, I prefer that too. Basically the only house I don't feel uncomfortable in (besides my own) is that of my mum :-)

I just had 3 of my best friends at my apartment for a few days. It was a great time, especially since I hadn't seen them all together in about 6 months. But still, my regular routine was non-existent while they were here. I failed to keep up with the news, do much work or reading because I was so preoccupied socially. Like anything, having guests, even if they are really close, needs to be managed in moderation. I have yet to stumble upon anything that I don't find wise to take in moderation, even friendship.

Agreed.... too much of a good thing just isn't... a good thing. We're fairly private people to start with, so visitors tend to throw us off more easily than many people, I suspect.

I have had the same thing, always glad to have the house for ourselves again.

There's just a certain sense of relief at having our own space back.

Good post, and I totally agree with your sentiments.

Thanks! I really hadn't spent much time thinking about it till I started journaling a bit.

amazing post :)