Embodiment of sucess

When you envision a polished wordsmith, what image or profession first comes to mind? I Immediately I think of a smug, suit-clad businessman much like Don Draper on the tv series Mad Men. The character of Don Draper is a brilliant ad man who commanded the respect of not only those below him but also of those above him. He achieved the picturesque life of a successful businessman in the early 1960s by having an intuitive understanding of the consumer's mind and having a way with words. If you had to define Don Draper with one keyword, that word would most likely be "successful."

Regardless of who you are or what you're doing in your daily life, you are constantly selling your image, beliefs, and abilities to others. Your friends are people whom you've convinced over time that you're a cool dude or gal to hang with. You'll have to convince your buddies why they should come to your party over someone else's on the same night. You'll have to sell to your crush why they should be dating you. You'll have to sell to that company you're pitching why they should place an order with you. Even when walking down the street you are selling personality through the way you dress and the how you present yourself to strangers. There's no doubt in my mind that success is fundamentally relative to how well one is able to communicate with others.

A popular misconception is that extroverts are naturally better communicators because they love to be social. The only advantage extroverts have over introverts is that because they are comfortable around people, they are more inclined place themselves in a social situation where they can master their craft. Whereas introverts are more inclined to avoid social situations, therefore placing them at a disadvantage.

Expert communicators aren't born, they are made. Polish your communication technique like you would any other important life skills and you'll make it further in life than those who don't. With practice, you'll be able to start and maintain a conversation with anyone. Below are a few simple techniques you can apply to your life to earn the respect of anyone you talk with. I'll break it down for you here so that you'll be able to communicate like a winner.

The setup- how to look like a winner

Even before you open your mouth, your conversation partner already made an opinion about you. Regardless how accurate it is or not, that mental first impression has lasting consequences. 80 percent of your listeners' first impression has nothing to do with your words. It's not all what you say, but how you say it.

1.) Practice good posture and limit the fidgeting. Head high, shoulders back, feet weightless and most importantly, be relaxed. A relaxed and open body language communicates that you're agreeable. You can earn bonus points by subtly mimicking the speaker's body language. Avoid touching your face as it can make the listener feel you're fibbing and you'll appear less credible.

2.) Maintain firm eye contact especially when communicating with women. Lessen the eye contact slightly when communicating with men as some may feel threatened or misinterpret your intentions. In a group setting, look at the speaker

3.) Captivate people with your smile. Practice your award-winning smile in the mirror. Try a few different smiles until you have a killer arsenal and they feel natural. The more comfortable you are with your smiles, the more sincere and confident you'll appear.

4.) Big winners are always prepared for the "what do you do?" pop quiz. Prepare a few exciting stock answers for when the question arrives. Consider the possible interest the other person has in your answer. (could he refer business to me or become my buddy?) tailor your reply according to what might interest them.

5.) Read up on the latest news for some additional casual conversation fodder.

The execution -Be in the moment and pay attention.

Everyone loves a good listener. Make it a habit to keep a keen eye on your listener's reaction to your words then act plan your moves accordingly.

1.) Match the mood of your delivery to theirs. Before opening your mouth, Identify your listener's state of mind (are they roused, bored or melancholy?) and try to match it if you wish to bring them around to your thoughts.

2.) Pick up clues on your conversation partner's preferred topic. Ask about their preferred topic and they won't be able to shut-up!

Simple techniques to sounding like a pro

1.) Parroting. If you find yourself trying to keep a dying conversation going or if your mind goes blank when it's your turn to speak, don't panic. Simply repeat back the last few keywords your conversation partner said, in a sympathetic, questioning tone.

2.) Echoing. Pay attention to the speaker's choice of words, nouns, verbs prepositions and adjectives and use the same words. If your conversation partner use the noun chalet to describe her new holiday property, do not use the noun cabin when referring to it. Use chalet.

2.) Use Empathizers. Empathizers are short supportive statements that show you understand the speaker. Try replacing your "Ummm" and "uh huh" with empathizers that encourage the speaker to continue. Bonus points for using "anatomically correct empathizers". Out of our five senses, we all have a preferred or strongest sense. Try to figure out what is your associate's and use it in your empathizers. (i.e. Use "I feel you" instead of " I hear you" if they are kinesthetic individual.

3.) Flesh out your replies and avoid single word responses.When asked about your city or occupation, follow up your reply with some interesting fact about your hometown or occupation that others can better relate to. "Chicago, Illinois" doesn't mean anything to someone who's never been to Chicago.

4.) Ask around for information. Spot someone you wish to know better at a gathering? Ask the host or a mutual friend to make the introduction or provide a few facts that you can turn into icebreakers.

5.) Start every appropriate sentence with YOU.Use the word YOU liberally in conversations to grab the listener's attention.

6.) Find opportunities to use the words "we" and "us", even if you've just met.This technique will create a feeling of intimacy will gain you more rapport.