Gringalicious Thoughtful Thursdays: On Comparison & Being Individual

in life •  7 years ago  (edited)

“When you’re 20 you care what everyone thinks, when you’re 40 you stop caring what everyone thinks, when you’re 60 you realize no one was ever thinking about you in the first place. You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.”

-Winston Churchill

Happy Thursday my friends. I know this isn’t my typical kind of post but if there’s anything I realized about myself while taking some time away from posting regularly, for many reasons and most of them out of my control, it’s that I want to share more and connect more with you guys. If you’re here for recipes that’s great also. You can find lots of them in pretty much every other post. However if you happen to be interested in reading on, grab a cup of coffee and continue. (Trust me, you’ll need something strong to get through my rambling.)

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Ever since I started this blog I’ve felt there was some essential part that was missing and including a little more on a personal note is something I’ve never been an expert at. Not that there’s anything wrong with celebrating food and leaving it at cookies and cupcakes everyday. Seriously, who doesn’t love food photos and chocolate #foodporn? But the thing is I’m a real person over here with real problems and you’re a real person behind whatever screen you’re reading this from.

In a world where we all carry around these tiny supercomputers that fit in our hands and, for a lot of us, it feels as if our lives depend on having them there 24/7, it’s really easy to scroll through highlights of everyone else’s lives and instantly have your self-worth plummet to zero. I mean, there’s never been a time in history that people have had the ability to share so much and connect with others all across the globe. While it’s amazing and so useful, I think it’s important to remind each other that it can be extremely superficial and one-dimensional.

Someone’s life can appear perfect from the edited and glossed over bits they choose to share, while their actual lives are a huge mess. I’m so guilty of this myself. The past few months have been some of the best ever for me but a year ago, two years ago? I could just as easily share posts and hide behind recipes when I was going through some really deep struggles as I can now when I happen to be in a bright season of my life. Oh, and please don’t take that as me saying I don’t struggle anymore, or get stressed out, or worry about ridiculous things, or faceplant on my bed for an hour trying to hide from the world when something feels unmanageable (been there, done that). I’m human too, guys. I get scared, I bleed, I forget things, oh and if we all got graded on social media skills I’d get a big fat F every time.

I just sometimes wonder what the world would be like if we all wore our vulnerabilities as badges rather than waste so many hours of pointless energy trying to hide them? How much stronger could we be if we spent more time building others up rather than tearing ourselves down? There is so much power in being able to say “So what?”

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I know it’s so cliché and your mom probably told you this a million times, but comparison really is the thief of joy. I can’t tell you how much time I’ve probably wasted throughout my life trying to change something about myself to be more like someone else when I could have been spending that time embracing who I am and doing the things that make me happiest. Don’t compare your chapter 2 to someone else’s chapter 10 because your life is so unique and don’t waste the incredible person that you are by focusing on who you think you’re not. Envy is a miserable road that goes nowhere.

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When I was little my mom would say “Hang your troubles on the line. You take yours and I’ll take mine.” While I never truly understood this until I got older, it really stuck. It’s taken me almost 22 years to finally reach a place in my life where I’m starting to care less about what others think about me and more about what I think about myself.

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Basically, I’m saying don’t waste time thinking that if you could be in someone else’s shoes you’d be happy because I can pretty much guarantee that their not. In fact, if you really think about it the people who spend the most time making their lives look perfect on the outside are the ones that have the least time to actually live it. I’d say some of the happiest people I know in real life are the ones that know how to laugh at themselves. There will always be someone who does it better, has more, knows more…… Be yo-self!

Okay, now someone kick out the soapbox from underneath me or something. Head high, shine bright, and fake it till you make it. You got this.

I love you guys!

XOXO

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ALL CONTENT IS MINE AND ORIGINAL! All of these food photos were taken with my Nikon D5300 and my favorite Lens, the Nikon AF-S FX NIKKOR 50mm f/1.8G. You can find out more in my INTRO POST.

And, by the way, to all the minnows out there, my intro post did a huge $0.21. The key to success on Steemit is to be consistent and persistent.

Also, a huge shoutout to @rigaronib for designing my logo!


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cool photo :)

It's more than motivating! Great inspiration here. Stay happy and Steem on!

Agreed, plus I love Winston Churchill quotes! 💪😎🤙
Lets-be-friends.gif

Fantastic post... marvelous... you are very beautiful person...

thanks so much @wilku

Ok I must know, who is your photographer?

it's a combo of my Dad and my sister, thanks for asking

Thanks for replying. You are very dedicated.

wise beyond your years!!

always, always so supportive @noboxes, thanks so much!!

Cool post. It is interesting how much a person is worried about what others think especially in Junior High an High School.

I think some comparisons can be good for people though. In athletics if you see someone else who is capable of something then your perspective changes and you want to achieve it as well. If the competition isn't always raising the bar then you don't get better.

:-) have a great day!

I agree with you in athletics. Every NBA player should aspire to be as good as Lebron.

However, I'm not so sure that it's healthy for me to be as good as Lebron, at basketball, it's never going to happen.

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying be less than we can be. I am simply saying be real about who you are and don't try to be like the person on the magazine that's been photoshoped, which they're not real either.

And, more importantly, thanks so much for your commenting and your current support. We've been together on here for many months, my relationship with you is more important than MY opinion. So, I hope the take away here is, thank you for all of your support!

Edit: I picked basketball because I know that's your game

Yeah I get you 100%. I was just talking to a friend yesterday about the situation with the girls one the covers of magazines. It isn't attractive to use because it doesn't even look like a real person at that point. It just looks like a plastic digital animation. I can imagine how if effects people trying to look at those types of pictures and feeling like they have to look like that. And then when it comes down to it a lot of guys don't actually think that is attractive. Hahhaha

Yeah we have been on here for a long time and it is kind of crazy with all the new people that get on here in these price surges. Sometimes I see someone else that seems to have a high reputation and seems to be blogging a lot and I sometimes wonder if they know about bloggers like us? There have been times on this platform where I almost felt like everyone kind of knew about everyone else who was on here. I know that almost seems impossible but it sort of did seem that way for awhile.

how relaxed you are @gringgalicious, i like your photos that you sit on the bed , good job !

I like the word you ever said :the key to success on Steemit is to be consistent and persistent.

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

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Great post, Yes ...to try only care about what we think of ourselves....and less screen time!!

SO true @steemama! I had to chuckle to myself when I saw that picture/meme because I feel the same way! I look around at the young kids nowadays and just have to shake my head...I feel like telling them "go climb a tree! enjoy your REAL life and participate in it!" And thanks @gringalicious for inspiring all of us to remember these things :-)

Great meme, thanks @steemama!

Yes @steemama I once posted that on my FB page with the same sentiments! So glad.

And @gringalicious solid words. Self awareness and reflection do wonders to realize what the heck matters.

This post is just as great, or even better than your recipes. I enjoy those a lot too (although I usually end up not using them) but I loved reading about you and they way you think. For a 22 year old girl you sound really mature by the way!
I hope to read more like this from you :)

thanks so much for the fantastic commenting

Oh my god Gringalicious your only 22! I was not half as balanced and tuned in at your age! at 22 I was a disaster!! good on you :-)

such a great post @gringalicious , i really loved it , especially your sentence "comparison really is the thief of joy" !! it's true

I agree with you and all the time in my life i try to don't think about others and ... I just compare myself with myself , and try to reach my goals ,, my calm is my calm , we have the same sentence in farsi (persian) :

"Don't compare other's outside of life with your inside of life "

great post

I think that there is something to be said about quality of vulnerability. Life can be tough, even for those who seem to have a picture perfect life. We hide behind lenses, snapped and edited before ever posting. Sharing only the moments that show our edited and high-lighted moments in life. I suppose I could get on my soapbox, but I think for now you've covered the bases well. I read every word.

I would just say that Christ makes all the difference. He enables us to live with a purpose and LOVE. I think that's a huge part of it. The purpose? To Worship our Creator. As you noted on... thinking less about yourself and focusing on others is the key. To LOVE and worry less. :)

I agree with you @whitneynoel; when one lives a Christ-centered life the focus is no longer on us it is on HIM :-) And maybe that makes it easier to "not care" what others think of US (unless we talk about caring in the sense of being a good example), because it's not about us, it's about reflecting Christ...what do you think?

@gringalicious, look so beautiful.XOXOXOXO

Thanks @pariza!

Good for you Gringa! The more you write about these things, and process them externally, the more freedom the process will bring- being honest and open is an awesome step toward freedom and healing- I know blogging here has brought me a ton of both <3

Proud of you!

This is a great post! In this digital age it is too easy to forget or realize that there are always individuals within every digital communication. so in the spirit of being aware, I say hello and thank you. upvoted and resteemed

Happy Thursday and thanks @stu-precious

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

this is very nice. good job resteemed it

I really appreciate it @superday!

don't smile like this,bcz the boys will be mad for you.
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Hehe, well you flatter me @flora.lori! Thanks my friend and have a great day!

😘❤ my friend

Nice Photo..

We are all humans on life's rollercoaster, may you have a good day @gringalicious

thanks so much for the great commenting and continued support @gamainvegas

You dear is my Shero. Lolzzzz! I know there is no word like shero. But permit me to call you that Sweetheart.

I love the way you wrote from your heart and your encouraging yet motivating words is fabulous. You my Dear are a Princess. Smiles! Thank you so much for sharing this content with us the steemit community. I love you Dearie! Steem on.

thanks so much @efelexy, very kind words

My pleasure dearie! I am glad I can put a smile on your beautiful face. Life is sweet and must be enjoyed in all fullness. Keep steeming Sweetheart.

Hahaha başarılı, bir sunum thank you

Awesome photography, but who is behind the scene. Curious to know about that person.

that's a combo of my Dad and my sister. Thanks so much for commenting @errajesh

But if you were picture, then who was camera?

Haha, well I do have family @charitybot !

Interesting, you don't look part-DSLR.

I LOVE the vibe of this post. & you're so pretty sis :)

Oh, so sweet. Thanks @gravity9!

Great post, well said

thanks so much @henrywilson

Nw at all, I do similar stuff actually, feel free to have a look if you have the time :)

Thank you for sharing.

It was an honest and very touching post.

thanks so much @catherinedouglas

Beautiful

I'm thrilled you like it @tracyjames!

I don't think there's anyone who will read through and not get something. You did well and did hit the nail at the head.

Honestly, I am very happy to read your article, you create an exciting content that can make me relax reading it, can you visit my blog ?? @umar97

I am thrilled you liked it @umar97, thanks so much

IMG_3980.PNGTo be honest you look so prepossessing in this pic, and you have extraordinary smile😊Keep your smile with you dont let it fades away, post is awesome , nicely written, adoration for your post❤️

Oh, very sweet @faltumanxe

great insights into who you are, and confirms why i am following you, my friend

So kind of you @johnnyray! I so appreciate having your support!

Nice to meet you, gringalicious. You are wonderful! Good luck!

thanks so much @sinilga, I appreciate your comments

Great words to live by. Be uniquely You! <3
Thank you for this post.

So happy to share @nwjordan!

Love this kind of post! Have a great day!

You too @paulawonders!

Yes, yes, yes! Be your own best cheerleader. At the end of the day, you are the only one who has to live with you 24/7. Do what makes you happy, and what inspires you. 🙌

Thanks for reading and all the sweet comments @offbeatbroad!

what a lovely post. yes, more of this. open up, breath, fantastic photos and YES, we need to CONNECT and help each other because behind the scenes we are all living out our real reality, sharing that helps others come forward too. props for doing that! :)

I'm so glad you feel that way @teamhumble! So good to hear from you today!

you bet. if you ever need someone to bounce chat off, you know where to find me!

yeah, that wasn't like your older posts but it has its own value giving us the idea we have many things to do in this life which we haven't done yet.
another great post my dear.
Thanks and you are looking pretty but I've noticed you sad in some pictures.
can i know the reason ?

Wow..this is truly inspiring.

thanks so much for taking the time to comment @verasj

superb thank you for sharing.

I'm so glad you liked it @haniaking !

Very inspiring story and the images are beautiful too

thanks so much @younjerv, I am glad you liked the photos

That is a problem today. Everyone is faking it through social media. If they are not connected 24/7 they aren't happy. Then when they do read all the gobbledygook, they still aren't happy. People need to stop comparing themselves to others. You are unique. You are you. You have your own life to live. You can't live someone else's. Drop the phone. Leave it behind and see how your life is without being connected for a weekend. You might even surprise yourself.

wow, a whole weekend, not sure if I could do it. LOL

thanks so much for the great commenting @cecicastor

Loved the article and most of all your sincerity! We all need to focus more on ourselves and enjoy us as we are. We all need to make our appearance the same with our reality.

what can i say

apparently not much

no words for that beauty

These are Great pictures of you. Inspirig.

I appreciate your support @saych!

Excellent post ... thanks for sharing

votre article est impressionnant merci pour le partage

İçten ve dogal bir yazı 😊

Congratulations @gringalicious, this post is the eighth most rewarded post (based on pending payouts) in the last 12 hours written by a Superhero or Legend account holder (accounts hold greater than 100 Mega Vests). The total number of posts by Superhero and Legend account holders during this period was 41 and the total pending payments to posts in these categories was $4985.95. To see the full list of highest paid posts across all accounts categories, click here.

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I appreciate this post and agree with your philosophy. Every day I reflect on being my authentic self and what is important to me. I'm glad I found your blog to follow. Thanks for the inspiration to live more "off screen." As a new steemian I'm working on finding ways to share with, and receive from, the community without spending several hours online every day. It's a challenge! Take Care!

You're right, it is a challenge. Thanks so much for the fantastic commenting @mininthecity

Gradually making more time for steemit... Here's the story of why I finally joined Instagram today. I'll follow you there!

https://steemit.com/sustainability/@mininthecity/instagram-instafame-no-vehicle-required

Good

Simply beautiful!!! If you like to watch interesting content i invite you to follow me and upvote my last post. Regards!
@azizu

I don't know how society came to this point that every blogger I know has at least one of these posts. I am not saying it's bad to remind us of it. I think its great. But how did we come to this point?

im new to steemit and I came here to understand how some people are using there photos in Blogs I think that this was a very good one and want to thank you for helping me get a better understanding

I like this post and your photos are amazing!

I love this! Your words are so true on how everyone is human and sometimes only share and show the parts of themselves that are going great even when they're struggling.
Thanks for the reminder that it's okay to just be yo-self! :D

Thanks so much for the great commenting @lifetipsbysn

Thanks for sharing your writing!

Thanks for sharing this @gringalicious You said the truth of life
really peoples think what others are thinking about us
but I learned that don't think about others do what you want to do
once again thanks @gringalicious

So sweet @alenajames ! Thank you for reading!

I love this type of post too. We can now know you better.

I love to get to know my friends @crissimoes, thanks!

You look like you are fun to be around. Nice shots of you having fun. I like the one-leg photo on the bridge!

You really add a lot to Steemit!

Thanks @sponge-bob! Happy Thursday.

you're an awesome sister!

Always so sweet and supportive, thanks so much @freerunner

I’d say some of the happiest people I know in real life are the ones that know how to laugh at themselves.

If you've figured this out - and believe it, at your age, then you are way ahead of the crowd. It will definitely be an advantage for you.

The only person who really cares about how you act and how you look is you. Everyone else is just mildly interested. ;-)

Great advice @gikitiki!

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

Heyy!!
Good post

I appreciate it.

I’m in my forties so I know what you mean about not caring

welcome to steem @wham. Thanks for taking the time to comment. If you haven't not seen this post, it may be of some use to you - https://steemit.com/steemit/@kus-knee/the-old-dog-makes-a-personal-welcome-to-bit-sp-and-to-all-newcomers-a-comprehensive-guide

Awww this is very true @gringalicious :) Leo Buscaglia said be a peach when you're a peach! Never despair of becoming a banana when you're a peach! When everyone loves you to be this and that, say: Hey! Get a life! Been there, too. And when I finally embraced the person underneath my skin, I started to love myself even more and the people around me. Happiness comes when there is happiness within. Thank you so much for sharing this inspiring part of you. Keep steeming! Much love from Cebu, Philippines :)

beautiful commenting @resevillariasa, thanks so much!!

Hey @gringalicious
Thanks for update about life style. Its really wonderful and nice blog.

Great to heat from you @nayyabsipra!

I think I was lucky to start with the 40-year-old's view, even as a kid. And then move to the 60-year-old's view in my 30s. Being on social media that has rewards, like Steemit, is so different. Who wants to create and then not get any views or appreciation? It's a real difference in reality.

And good point about everyone having challenges. It's part of being human. Maybe there should be an Internet day, like Caturday on Saturday, but for everyone to just be their worst, lol. ; )

everyone be their worst, mmm, interesting. sometimes, I think that is Mondays in the USA. Great commenting as always @haphazard-hstead and thanks so much for the continued support

wow. its an awesome article . I have learn a lot . im still new here in steemit. can you please help me and support me in my blog. thank you :)https://steemit.com/life/@thefairlady/my-life-as-a-teacher-and-i-am-proud-of-it

well, first thing, don't spam my post, that would be a great start

Speak sistah! You're 100% right with these thoughts - which is why I've abandoned all social media (except if you count Steemit) in favor of REAL LIFE relationships - like in person! I recently heard someone talking about the book Sapiens, and while i have bought the hard copy but haven't yet ead it, the conversation went along these lines: we, as humans, are NOT evolved to be connected constantly to everyone everywhere across the whole world - we are not equipped to deal with all of the feelings, the news, the self-marketing, and everything else that comes with relationships that are not 'in person' and genuine. Like everything in this world, balance is key, moderation wins, and for me, at least, increasing my relationships with people NEAR me, like my co-workers, friends, neighbors, and family, while being more moderate on the other distanced 'relationships', has helped SO much in achieving balance, with a bonus of not feeling like crap after scrolling through a random feed that someone is probably faking anyway! xo

balance is always important, you're right. Real life interactions are without question more sincere, more fruitful. It's funny that I am here on steem, I've always disliked 'social media.' But, I've tried not to be the canned 'social media' persona here, I hope I have succeeded. I am what I am, not anything more. Amazing commenting @jaymorebeet, thanks so much

You definitely have -and i think that's what makes steemit so unique- there is hardly a trace of that 'fake perfect life' thing that infects so many other things on the internet :) steem on!

I swear that you are so beautiful

Oh, you're way too sweet @askmee, just stop hehe.

Reading your material catches me up because its really happening, but girl, your smile, really catched my attention! nice job, boys will really do love you, have a wonderful day!

welcome to steem, I wish you the best of success

It is good to go upstream. Great article. Lovely photos.
I'm Oatmeal.

oatmeal, great to hear, thanks so much for commenting

"comparison really is the thief of joy"

You got me on this and I cant say more. Indeed they are thieves and they have taken a lot from us without us knowing.

Thank you for this timely reminder @gringalicious

thanks so much for taking the time to comment on my post @wdoutjah

nice thoughts and intresting post.

welcome to steem

Appreciate yourself more and you will shine! If no one appreciates you then appreciate them as they need your appreciation - they just got lost along the way.
As humans we always have problems as we are always searching for self-worth or perfection. We should aspire to be better as humans, however don't compare yourself with others. We are worth something when we were conceived, the rest is a bonus. Live your life to the fullest. Whether that be staying in the same town for your whole life helping your local community or traveling the world to help others. Don't pressure yourself to make it happen as it will happen with the right mindset!

thanks so much for the awesome commenting @travelling-two, and thanks so much for the continued support

Great post and XOXO you are looking gorgeous.

thanks so much and welcome to steem

very beautiful so young.

I'm so glad you liked it @haniaking!

you go, gurl!

thanks so much for taking the time to comment @blairwarner

this is very nice article and one this I would like to share is "to be yourself" that is the most happiness. I love to be myself be strong be happy and people around me can be happy to because they can feel in me :-) Thank you for your post today, this make me have a big smile now:-)

oh one more thing, you are so cute .. i like your smile i can feel that is real and sincere :D

Have a wonderful day @gringalicious

thanks so much for all of the kind words @giantkidishere

You welcome my dear @gringalicious I like to read the article like and you know what !! your article could help many people to understand how to be happy with the way they are .. inspired pepole

you know how to be happy in this life and how to live better :)
successful work and this summer is very sincere, reflects your soul. I wish you never lost your life light. you are also very sweet
Thank you :)

thanks so much for the super sweet comments @artizm

💟💟💟💟💟

thanks

Thanks a lot @gringalicious for insparition and encouraging post! You've done great job. I look forward next post

thanks so much for commenting on my post @aknur

Hello friends, follow and upvote me!
this is a humanitarian volunteer account from Indonesia Red Cross.
Thanks.

welcome to steem, i wish you the best of success

yes, be yourself, your the most important person in your life, ever.
peace love and happiness
D

Thank you for writing this post, people tend to be so hard on themselves, we live in an era where the media pushes people to be perfect. But all of us are so different and have different qualities and that's what should be celebrated. Not looking to others like you said and trying to be them, we need to come together and help one another realize that who we are is enough.

This is an incredible post! You are one of the most amazing people I know.
I totally agree with you....people spend far too much time trying to compare themselves to others, and trying to make their lives look perfect on the outside. (It's such a Facebook world!)
You know my motto "Live like there's no tomorrow!" Be happy with who YOU are, and don't waste a moment of this precious life!
I love you bigger than the sky!

I love you too @lifes-a-donut, thanks for all the support, always!

Such a raw and motivating post. Thanks for sharing this and being so honest. 'Comparison really is the thief of joy', i've actually never heard that before, but that really hit home with me today.

What refreshing insight and a detour from your usual mouth watering recipe!

Your outlook at life is a very good one and i too have only recently come to this frame of thought. "You do you" as people say.

The real "opponent" is the self, who are the only person worth comparing to. So long as I know the "today" me is better than "yesterday" me.. no matter how small the delta. Over time the compounding will result in unbelievable changes when the difference is clear.

Oh you do yoga too. Wow I read it fully. Nyway Thats something to think about for sure. Nice thoughts :)

yup, I do some yoga. Maybe some day I will post about that

I love the way you think ... come true. and, I am also amazed ... you are very beautiful and energetic when photographed objects

Good job dear keep it up thanks for sharing

So happy to be sharing it @cristitaylor !

Hi Nice Post.
Sis

really, what part was your favorite?

I relate to this so much. The 'fear of missing out,' the comparison, and even jealousy has become so strong (and easy to do) with social media, that it can make it hard to appreciate when you actually are in your own life.

I know exactly what you mean

So beautiful 😍

thanks

good

Love that you have such a positive outlook on life! I agree with your thoughts wholeheartedly! Everyone should care more about what kind of example they are than how can they mold their lives​ to be like someone else's​.

thanks for the great commenting @horydub

Great start off to the day with this great thoughtful post for me :)

Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed reading. Very nice

amazing post....

When I see a post like this that has so much quality and deepness, I am really happy to see that it gets a lot of upvotes. Steemit needs more of this. Great job Gringalicious! I am enjoying following you. Keep up the positive vibes! :)

Absolutely loved this. Having the same awareness and learning to stay true to my heart. To me. Thank you for sharing and inspiring gorgeous girl!

You are so right. People waste their time being someone else instead of being themselves! Happy Friday! :)