Feel A Bit Better Already. To Focus On The Story!

Bummed about not having the $2000 right now. Still feel better focusing on what's important. Telling the stories. I'm getting those flashbacks to childhood seeing people raise kids today. All the problems that go along with it in a confused and confusing culture. A friend has a child in Catholic school. I feel bad for them. I think the whole fear based paradigm of good v.s. evil is false and wrong to put onto a child. The unnecessary guilt that no child has business dealing with.

I grew up in a world full of harsh paranoia and fear. Religion was a part of that. It was scary. My mom has mental illness, delusions. I got to know the fear and confusion well. The notion of false punishment. To get in trouble for 'not believing' whether it be in religion, the government, the school system etc. If you didn't act like you trusted those institutions you would be punished. I got that sense growing up. I got the dunce cap in school, forced to sit on my hands. Church guilt tripped you with original sin, like you must feel guilty for being born. You exist so repent!? Why!? I never felt I deserved that treatment. What did I do, I was just a kid!?

A big part of it is poverty discrimination. If a kid has a harder home life and is unable to concentrate they get punished. That ain't right. The poor kids are pushed onto medication. Get the guilt trip forced on them if they can't perform. So anyway I am going back to thinking about that sort of thing in the last while. That's all. It's still going on. Punishment based culture still exists and it's sick and needs to be put down. It's an excuse to belittle the vulnerable.