The Desire That Turns Into Wish, Becoming a Programmer

The Desire That Turns Into Wish, Becoming a Programmer   

Nowadays, aspiring students who want to become a fully pledged programmer seem to not fully recognize and appreciated what it takes to become one. One unsightly evidence is the lack of perseverance and analysis when a professor especially a sarcastic and narcissistic being gives a specific activity or rather a program to be wholesomely created. They tend to idolize the creation of copy + paste which I, myself confides that I worship it and the inevitable diffusion of the internet without even thinking further beyond on solving the given problem at hand.     

They fully put their constant trust towards the infinite source of wisdom and knowledge named as Google. Yes, it is superb and a good idea to sneak and base your codes from the web but self-assured that you fully understand the hierarchy of processes, algorithms, variables, and the likes involved inside the spectrum of it. Seeing the problem in the whiteboard as a bloody hell welcoming you to be engulfed is one thing too. It feels like your thumbs are numb which makes you unable to even type a single dot.    

Feels like your brain is either overload because of the information from other subjects or you just really don't have any single idea on what or how in heaven you are going to solve it. It is like seeing the problem as a mere astral form of a ghost which gives you a chilly feeling of goose bump which starts from head unto the feet. I have this funny situation too where, when I see the problem it feels like the time was frozen still for the reason that it really really moves slower than a sloth.    

Sometimes, I do not see the programming subjects as a motivation for the reason that they are hard to get, more harder than courting your crush in campus that you have a fantasy on. I have this funny close friend in a programming subject, who has a hobby of typing in the keyboard whenever our professor looks at him even though he really just do not have an answer for the problem which leads him to not just fooling the professor but utmost fooling himself. Even though I am adapted to a fully air-conditioned classroom, it feels like I was teleported into Antarctica by some kind of unknown sorcery whenever the teacher starts to mumble the first word of the problem.    

Another problem that we are tackling as a programmer student is the teachers themselves. Eight out of ten scenarios in our classes, our professor explains a basic program yes it was fully understood and is ready to tackle on to the next level but sadly he gives an activity that is out of the realm from this dimension and even says that he have not yet discussed the specific codes that can solve the given obstacle. It is like listening to a mathematics class which has a lesson of 1 plus 2, takes a note, then 2 minus 1, takes a note, but sadly in just a blink of an eye the writings in the board was suddenly all about differential calculus and physics.    

As a result, nothing was magnetized in our brain's neurons. Another thing about teachers are when you ask a question for being curious about a specific topic but resorted to answering you with a degrading remark towards you which leads you to just play the deaf, blind, and mute monkey. One degrading situation was that when a specific student asked about initializing and declaring variables for being slow and not fully sensing the topic but our teacher just shouted at him and tells him to pack his traveling bags, shift course into hotel and restaurant management, and to just throw bottles of wine in the air.   

Well yes, to become a programmer is not just hard but overwhelmingly hard. But it does not mean that I degrade the other professions that you have had chosen to take on it is because there is no easy profession in the society that we are living in name it a blue ribbon or whatsoever. Yes, diversity of occupations in the community could be gasped but we are all working for the sake of helping the other people who needs our specialty. We don't live for ourselves; rather we live for the whole mankind. There is even a saying which says as far as I could recall as "No man is an island". Don't give up! Keep on typing entangled with the value of analysis.

    

This desire were now turn to a wish, a wish that will never be come true, not that I don't like it anymore but due to the constraints that hinders me to pursue and that is time. This goal requires so much extra time which I don't have because as a head of the family I have to work for a living to sustain the needs of my family.    

Why I don't have time when I go home every day and stayed at home during night time? Aside from time, sickness is another factor why I could not pursue this dream because I could not endure staying in front of the computer for a long time, it makes me feel dizzy and wanted to puke whenever I started to feel the pain the my eyes and head.   

I just leave this dream to my kids, if anybody of them wanted to become.