I started saying I didn't want children when I was a child myself.

But when I got older I actually did go through a period of time where I could fathom and stomach having kids and even pondered whether maybe, if financially stable, I would want children. Now, quite a few years and a lot of pondering later, I am certain that I do not want kids and I have many, solid reasons for coming to that conclusion.

Here are the main reasons I decided not to have children:

• There's a lot of humans already.

I think there are plenty of people choosing to have kids and I think we have enough, if not too many, humans. Perhaps, you may say, not too many right now but exponential growth is a thing and humans are pretty bad at respecting the planet. That is the first reason that I explored for why not to have kids. I understand the reasoning for people to have children and seriously do not dislike or judge people with kids. It was just one of my personal reasons for deciding not to have children.

• I am uncertain, and scared, of the future of society.

I don't really know if the world they would grow up in, would be one that I respect. I grow increasingly afraid of where the world, or at least my country, is heading. Just the fact the Trump is a serious presidential candidate right now makes me not confident that bringing a kid into the world would be a solid idea. Especially if I can't afford to leave the country, which brings me to my next point.

• I can't afford to have kids.

I am just starting to some-what get on my feet. (and that just means paying my bills) I would have to be very financially stable before I would consider having kids. Something I don't see happening for about another 4 years. I will then be 32 and just starting to be able to enjoy independence without the fear of struggling to survive. I don't want to plunge right into baby-making.

• The child would potentially inherit my mental illness.

Mental illness runs in my family. I have severe mental issues partially from abuse, partially from genetics. My family is full of addicts with depression and extreme anxiety. I don't want to bring a child into the world that may suffer as badly as I am due to mental illnesses. It would break my heart to watch them struggle with the same illnesses I have to live with.

• The child would have no family on my side.

I have no family. Bringing a child into the world who has no blood relatives seems a bit depressing. This child would have no grandparents, no cousins, no aunts. Well, I guess hopefully the spouse would have some family, right? Oh, my next point.

• I can't imagine agreeing with another person enough to raise a kid with them.

I have not been in a relationship where I get along with a guy and their core values enough to want to have children with them. I have many ideals that most people would not agree with and would cause a lot of fighting and probably a divorce.

• My ideals would make raising a kid extra complicated

I am idealistic. I would want to raise my kid vegetarian, and vegan once my breast milk dried up. Most people seem to think this is somehow abusive, which baffles me. I would let my kid choose to eat meat if they later decide to do so. I also want to home-school my kid which brings in a whole new set of struggles, complications and issues. I am also not religious and would be against my kid being made to go to church every week.

• I might kill my kids in a bath-tub.

And last but definitely not least. I am not nurturing and I have a very real fear that I would end up one of those mothers that went insane and drowned their babies in a bath-tub. Just my misophonia (rage at repetitive sounds) alone would make me a bad candidate for motherhood. I love kids and I love being around them in small doses but I honestly do not think I would make a good mother 24/7.

So, as you can see. I have given it a lot of thought.

And, the truth is, part of me has wanted babies in the past. I have woken up from dreams where I had a baby and I loved it and woke up feeling loss. My biological clock is still functional. But I did a lot of thinking and I know for certain it wouldn't work for me to have kids. I am not flexible on this and am not changing my mind about it like people often want to believe. Regardless, of any natural desire for having a child, I am not a mother. I am a woman but not a mother. Google "I don't love my child" and see how many posts come up. I don't want to be one of them.

I also do not believe that it is the most rewarding thing anyone can do with their lives. This is what most people try to bash into my head even after I explain I do not want children. I believe it is the most rewarding thing some people can do with their lives; people that have a strong desire for family and children. But for others, traveling and creating (non-human) art is just as rewarding.

This picture goes out to all those people that can't seem to grasp my decision to not have kids.

Again, nothing against people who are parents. I am sure they are much more suited for parenthood than myself. The world needs all kinds of people and some of those people just aren't parents. :)