What you once were

South Africa holds a dear place in my heart. No wait, the older South Africa holds a dear place in my heart. It was but a brief moment, stretching from the time after apartheid ended to just before the dramatic increase in crime. During this time it wasn’t unusual for young children to walk to school alone. Taking the next bus or train was a joy. But then it started to fall away one by one. As time passed parents told their children not to play in the front yard anymore. It wasn’t safe anymore to quickly run across the street to buy some sweets at the cafe. Gradually, more and more people stopped to catch a bus or train for fear of their lives. Neighbours stopped talking to each other and most started living in their own little jail – high fences, closed gates, locked doors.

But it was that South Africa I loved. The one where you had the freedom to walk across the street to buy something. The South Africa where you had the freedom to take a train or bus without wondering if you’ll still be alive at the next stop. The South Africa where it wasn’t a problem if you forgot to lock your door. Now, most of us live by constantly looking over our shoulders. We make very sure we lock our doors, we make sure that nobody stands nearby when we withdraw money, we make sure we don’t walk alone at night etc. Yes, we make sure that we do everything in our power not to become the next victim of crime.

So the time has come where I have to ask myself if I want to live the rest of my life like this. Do I want to stay in South Africa because of what it once was? Well, the answer is obviously no. One would think it would be that simple but truly it’s not. It’s the only place I ever called home. And although I’m not a big fan of Johannesburg and Pretoria I am quite fond of Cape Town. It will be hard to say goodbye to the blue mountains, the green grassy fields, the lush trees and the stretching seas. When the aeroplane will make its last turn over Cape Town there will surely roll a tear across my cheek. Because this was home.