Focusing on What Matters

in life •  7 years ago 

I met a new friend the other day - we’ll call him Jared. He’s the kind of man that the world would not think much of. He’s not tall. He is rather odd socially, and his skin problems would deter any modeling agency.

The two of us met as he was hanging around the coworking space. I was working on my article for the day and he came over and sat down to talk.

Because Jared is a bit awkward, he ask me the classic question, “what do you do?”

As I am reading through the book, Start With Why, I was in a particularly inspired mood. While Jared waited for my answer, I looked him in the eyes and said how I hated that question - with a smile of course.

After Jared visibly recovered from my statement, I went on a diatribe about the book I was reading and why talking about our cause, and what we believe is so important.

As I went on for a couple minutes, I saw the fire start burning in Jared’s eyes - he wanted to tell his story.

I listened as Jared shared why he was in school and what his dream was. He talked about his love for Christ and sports. His cause is to help people live better lives through those passions.

When Jared finished, we could both tell that something special had started. A friendship and camaraderie had formed because of who we are.

What excites me the most is that Jared has decided to join the ever growing community we have at @thefoundry. He wants to start his own business and take advantage of the network of mentors in our area.

I have no clue where this friendship will go or what Jared will do with his life. The important thing to me is that he will be around like minded people that want him to succeed.

We don’t look at Jared as some oddity and unworthy of our time. He has skills and talents that are unique to him and only he can share with people.

If we miss the odd ones, we miss what God has placed in them. He doesn’t look at the outward appearance, and neither should we.


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What a wonderful story Lydon. I like the shopping list analogy. It is the same everywhere I'm sure.
When we cut through the gibberish that passes for conversation and really engage and interact. Something magical happens.
Loved your response to Jared's question.
Caused him a little cognitive dissonance no doubt lol

I was just talking about Alan Turin yesterday and how you can draw a direct line from him, back to Ada Lovelace via Charles Babbage and the difference engine.

Today we can communicate across the world at the speed of light and yet the humble conversation seems to be stuck in amber from the neolithic era.

Light a candle rather than curse the darkness.
Great post Lydon.
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Light a candle rather than curse the darkness.

Well said my friend. Something magical does indeed happen when we pierce through the fluff and engage with people as soulful beings.

Hi Lydon, by any chance have you ever read Dietrich Bonhoeffer Life Together? Your post here reminds me a great deal of parts of his first chapter on community. He writes of how in Christ and through Christ we are placed in a community not of our own creation nor choice and the true calling is to relate to people as ones Christ is redeeming. The take away I hear in both the book and your account here is how incredible relationships become when we begin to look deeper than the places we tend to stop. Good stuff.

how incredible relationships become when we begin to look deeper than the places we tend to stop.

Oh how true that is.

I have not read Life Together. Bonhoeffer continues to be a tremendous influence on my life, and this particular book is on my reading list. :)

Excellent... I’d really recommend it. I’m actually teaching from it over the next 5 weeks in my congregation for a Lenten book study. It’s really an excellent read!

Ahh, curious to hear how that goes!

Funny story, my wife is taking a class this semester on Bonhoeffer. Can you guess which book she bought for the syllabus? :)

Ummm i'm going to go out on a limb and guess Life Together... but if i had a second guess it would have to be Cost of Discipleship... but I'm gonna go with my gut on this one
:)

Ding ding ding, we have a winner. Life together it is. :)

Well I hope she enjoys the read! Two weeks into teaching with my folks and I’d say what I keep hearing from folks is “it’s a dense read”... it is, but goodness there is some riches in there!

After reading many books, the only ones that stay in our library are the dense ones, lol. :)

It's impossible for us to make connections unless we share our hearts and minds with others. Not just the small talk stuff like what you had for dinner or where you last vacation was - those are interesting but a deeper conversation might be what you learned on your vacation and so on.

I like how you gave Jared time to speak. Many people don't get the opportunity to be heard. You were the ear for him that day - part of the body of Christ.

What do you do isn't as bad as what church do you attend. That one freezes my lips ;)

Many people don't get the opportunity to be heard.

And that is sad. It is incredibly hard to live unless we know our voice belongs.

I love it.

"What do you do?" ...sure, let me create a little box that you can put me in, no problem

Seems like Jared made a good recovery after starting with a bad question :)

It'd be cool if we had some new social norm ice breaker question, like "what would you change in the world if you could change one thing"

It'd be cool if we had some new social norm ice breaker question, like "what would you change in the world if you could change one thing"

Oh I like that. Imagine the surprised look you would receive from people, lol.

I usually ask folks what excites them or what is new in their life. That tends to start the creative wheels turning and leads to deeper conversations.

Ya, I like those questions too. Open-ended and lets them choose what they want to say.

Besides being boring, the "what do you do" type of questions is almost prying in a way. You're basically quizzing them for info, whether or not they wanted to share it with you.

Hmm, hadn’t thought of it that way. What do you do is a prying question and a means to validate ourselves in the pecking order.

You know I love people who are awkward and individual because that is real and people should be different from each other, we are born to be individual and yet media has convinced has that we should all look and act and dress the same way somehow. Lovely story and thanks for sharing it.

because that is real and people should be different from each other,

Exactly. We all like genuine people.

when I walk the dog people talk to me - it's rare when I finish a walk and don't stop and talk - I even visit across the fence with a few of Abbey's friends - and people will open up sometimes and tell me their life story - and then they end up in one of mine :)

You are the real deal, Lydon, and he felt comfortable. Well done.

You are so kind, my friend.

Great post. People around us are so judgemental. Its a pity when they label and judge people by their outer appearance. Never try to understand what they are going through life. Bitter realities of life........ah !!

Never try to understand what they are going through life.

There are some amazing stories out there if we would listen.

I have shared my first blog. Do check it out :) thanks

Well he sure seems like a nice person !& hope he gets his track on life in a good way !

That is what we are working towards!

No one think of the happiness all they want is leisure without the hard work

Not all, but a lot of people.

@lydon.sipe Each person has only twenty-four hours per day, and how we spend those hours shows what's important in our lives , life is so much brighter when we focus on what truly matters :)

You are quite right. :)

great post hero . thank you for sharing that post @lydon.sipe following you

The best I read today . Thanks for sharing ♥ keep going @lydon.sipe

I love your reflection friend is a great post and good contribution will continue your work greetings ..

Happiness is over rated. Truely so.
I go for being content.

Contentment is good.

Jokwr my favourite character