The Do Not List for When You Say I Do

My wife and I have had the blessing of watching multiple marriages that are 25 years and counting in our family.

Tucked within all that wisdom are a lot of things to do, and a lot of things not to do.

The list below is not original to our family, but it is a list that we refer to often as we work on our marriages.

I would be lying if I said that I don’t do any of the don’ts below. Two that I struggle with are stomping out on a bad situation or freezing my mate out.

It is easy to avoid things we don’t like. The problem is they don’t go away - they await us upon our return.

Call me crazy, but there is a country song that has stuck in my head and returns to the front burner whenever difficult circumstances arise.

That song has helped me laugh and refocus on what needs to happen whenever I encounter problems.

Let’s face it, marriage principles are relationship principles. The do’s and don’ts help us realize that dating doesn’t end when the rings go on - dating ends when the casket closes.

Hopefully you find some encouragement, inspiration or even conviction when you read through these warnings.

For me, I’ve found all three at different stages in my life, and my marriage is better for it.

-Never Raise your voice
-Never Publicly embarrass your mate
-Never quarrel before the children
-Don't use the kids to win
-Never use sex to win
-Never touch in anger
-Never call names
-Never get historical
-Never stomp out
-Never freeze your mate out
-Never use the in laws
-Never reason in the face of pain
-Don't let the sun go down on your anger
-Never reverse an argument
-Never fail to listen

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