Spaghetti

in life •  6 years ago 

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Waaaoooooooaahhhh!!!!! But I didn't want sauce on my spaghetti?!

Wailed the little lady, her mouth making a big 'O' of disappointment at her Daddy's ineptitude in dinner making.

But you asked for spaghetti and sauce?

I said helplessly.

I am sure she did anyway. Damn, I hope she did? Everything that had happened so far today was lost in a sea of fog borne of sleep deprivation.

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Last night had been a rough one. Being the weekend I was not allowed to raise the mizzen mast in the attic as was my normal antics during the week so that I was fresh for work. Oh no. It meant I had to share the family bed.

Which really was the family bed because the little lady ran in most nights and did an impression of a demented starfish which wasn't the most conducive thing to sleep. Add to this the little boom co-sleeping with the good lady on the other side meant it was more often than not a big sleepless limb fest.

Last night she came running through shouting about the monsters outside her window. This promptly woke up the little boom who also started yelling. No doubt he was also pissed off with the monsters outside the window.

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For two hours both kids tag-teamed each other at staying awake then as dawn was breaking fell and stayed asleep.

Of course, the good lady and I took this opportunity to fall upon each other and enthusiastically do the purple monkey shake. If the purple monkey shake means falling asleep in a dead faint.

Daddy, Mummy, wake up!!!

I cracked open an eye in disbelief.

The little lady was bouncing up and down in the bed, gleefully shouting that it was time to get up. I fumbled at my phone. Surely after the night antics, the pair of them would have allowed us a little lie in. A bit of an extra sleep?

5.45 AM

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Both kids were full of beans and there was no convincing them that sleep was a cool thing to be doing.

However, the lack of sleep began to tell and by about ten o'clock the beans ran out. Tears flowed at every little incident. Feet were stamped and voices were raised.

Eventually, we made it to dinner where the little lady went bananas because she didn't want sauce on her spaghetti.

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Through a subtle combination of diplomacy, threats and extortion eventually the tears and shouty madness calmed down. What followed was some thoughtful discourse on the subject of crying between the little lady and Mummy-bear.

It's alright to cry when you are upset. In fact, it is very healthy to let it all out.

Reassured the good lady to the little sponk.

The little lady stopped throwing the now acceptable spaghetti and sauce into her mouth for a moment.

So everyone cries then? Even Daddy?

Of course he does!

Exclaimed the good lady.

No I don't.

I huffed in a testosterone and beef voice.

The good lady laughed, a tinkling laugh at silly old Daddy.

Oh Daddy bear, yes you do. In fact, did you know that Daddy cried all throughout your birth and for a good bit after it.

The good lady smirked good-naturedly at me.

I made a wet fart face in return.

Daddy, why did you cry when I was born?

Enquired the little lady with wonder in her voice that the big man chap she called Daddy even knew what tears were.

This was the perfect time to tell her that I cried because I was overcome with emotion that we had created this perfect little addition to our family and that I was so happy I thought I was going to burst.

The lack of sleep answered instead.

Well little one. I think the reason I cried so much is that I knew what the next five years were going to bring.

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Awww my dearest Gentleman doing what he know best...I hope that many dad´s to be will read your posts and learn how to deal with kids before diving into production of kids...hahah. Another great one from you...hope you are well.

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Well little one. I think the reason I cried so much is that I knew what the next five years were going to bring.

You took the words right out of my mouth. I was sure you were going to end it with ...

I was overcome with emotion that we had created this perfect little addition to our family

But alas, our neurons were firing in the same pattern.

Any other day I would have ended it with the happy one. I am on the edge today! I might have to go to bed before ten!?!

  ·  6 years ago (edited)

Did I mention, 5 years is a little short on the estimate. You should not forget about the tween and teenage years.

I'd say 19.

This weekend, I asked my 19 year old daughter, who is now living in a different province, but visiting, if she was willing to drive as I wanted to have a couple of glasses of wine. She said "No problem, should I get you a glass."

At that moment, it was all worth it. The wine tasted a little better than normal.

Then she got to see daddy shed tears of joy.

19 years!! Ha, I finally have a number. I will live for that day! ;0)

Daddy, why did you cry when I was born?

I currently have 3 funny kids.
Your sentence that I quote, reminds me of when my children were born.
that's a very touching sentence.

Those are the blessings ...
Sweet tears i can say...

You know what they say.

Sweet tears are made of cheese...

Who am I to diss a Brie ...

Meanwhile, you have traumatised her forever.

Unless you quickly said you were talking about 5 years of sheer joy, love and fun.

I did turn it round pretty quickly!

Hehe, you got the song!!!

very true, friend, cheese. ha ha ha

;0)

And i would say
Stack that cheese
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Yeah!!!

The t i am wearing 😛

Lol, kinda thought that!

Yes full happiness

Cheers!! It is a wild time but it is very touching too. Wow at the three!

Hahaha, I like children, maybe for one or two baby at next time. I hope that I will have big family

I am sure you will! Big families are cool!

I'm so hopefull.
Thank's @meesterboom

The crying doesn't stop after 5 years. It gets worse and more costly. I think you need to stock up on beers now for your tasting posts otherwise it will be a monthly event.

Lol, I can see that happening. Sometimes I am relieved to go back to work at the start of the week!

Work becomes your hideaway and safe haven. You know you have a problem when you open and lock up at work.

Oh yes that is when you know things have gone too far!!

Ah the great spaghetti debate. The four year old screams and cries "I don't want sauce!!" every. single. time., only to be met with, "I didn't give you any that's not your spaghetti!" every.single.time.

Then of course my little Rose asks for sauce, sees Four without sauce and can not possibly have sauce on hers... but she does want cheese and pepper flakes. So the sauced bowl I'd given her becomes mine.

Five wants sauce and meatballs but no cheese until he's half finished. He also wants pepper flakes but can not for the life of him handle spice so I have to very carefully make sure only the tiniest flecks enter his bowl.

Seven wants sauce and cheese with no meatballs. Heavens forbid you try to give a kid that LOVES meatloaf a meatball.

Nine, Thirteen, and Sixteen want it proper at least, with everything.

Eighteen won't usually eat anything but pizza rolls, but hey she's an adult now she can eat what she wants so long as it doesn't mess with what I'm doing.

I can't let anyone serve themselves either because chaos.

About once a week. I make spaghetti a lot because its the easiest dinner option I've found yet.

It most definitely is the easiest at times. We tried the serving themselves thing. It was a disaster and we only have one old enough. Lol. I feel your pain!!

I laughed at the last sentence. I am single so I do not understand the hardwork of raising a child but I believe when your children grows up, you will be duly rewarded. Upvoted!

The rewards are already here, sometimes I just like to complain, lol!

hahahaha something to look forward to when/if I have kids. I would like to, but need to find a way to snatch up a great girl first. You always seem to find a way to turn a seemingly normal everyday occurrence into a right ball of laughter. oh and I do love a good spaghetti story, thankfully yours involves less pain then mine. hahaha oh and one of my nephews was the same way, didn't like ketchup or red sauce, always ate his spaghetti noodles with just a little bit of butter. haha

Hehe, I quite like spaghetti with some garlic butter, mmm mmm!!

I specialise in retelling the normal. lol!

Yes I will admit it is pretty good. haha. That is a good speciality! Have you ever heard of dry bar comedy on YouTube? It all seems to be everyday observational humor. You might get a kick out of it.
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCvlVuntLjdURVD3b3Hx7kxw/videos

@meesterboom like I did not know you when my children were small, I would have put all these examples into practice and you are right to say that you cry "I think the reason why I cried so much is because I knew what the next five years would bring"
I wish you a happy rest

I hope for a happy rest too!!

Put some whiskey in the little lady's drink! That will surely fix all the extra energy... my father did that with me when i was young, and i turned out ok...more or less

Hehe, you have no idea how many times I have been tempted!

Lol. The missus would greatly disapprove!

I hate to break it to you Mr. Boom, but you have at least 13 more years of the little lady before she is off to college. That is assuming that little boom watches his p's and q's. Thankfully I only had sons! But then they go off and have families and quite often return to the roost, with grandchildren in tow, to spend time for various reasons and your peace is shattered once again... 🤣😵

It is like I have opened pandoras box!! Oh what woe has been unleashed!! If I can get some more sleep I will be able to cope. Its all I ask!!

That is the song every parent sings...

Bahahahaha, if only we could tell our kids what we are really thinking. As much as we love them, there are moments that test our will. Many a good nights sleep was lost in my life. No wonder I feel 10 years older then I am. Thank god they're all over the age of 10 now.

That is the one big disdvantage to having kids in your forties, you dont have that many spare years to be bandying about!

Parenting. Sounds hard. Put a lock on your door. It worked for my friends.

I am thinking of getting a lock for my pants do I never have another by accident

I think that's called a vasectomy.

OMG!!! CLOSE YOUR EARS BEAUTIFUL PENIS OF MINE CLOSE YOUR SILKEN EARS!!!

Lol

Demented starfish! Hahaha! I thought I was done with the demented starfish routines when the children got to an age where they actually stayed in their beds-- then came Lucy the pitbull who things she's teeny tiny, when actually she's a frickin moose who sneaks onto the bed when we're sleeping and subtly pushes us both onto opposite edges!

Hehe, I am looking forward to when the child madness calms down in a couple of years and I can get a dog to do exactly the same!

Well little one. I think the reason I cried so much is that I knew what the next five years were going to bring.

Ahahahaha! The answer you're going to stick with until the little lady grows up and finds her better half. Then, that's when you divulge everything in your speech and cue the waterworks! Oh, what wonderful revenge that would be for all the crying and tantrums and world domination the wee lady had reigned down!

  ·  6 years ago (edited)

Oh, daddy! I bought plates that have divided sections and never, I repeat never put sauce on anything.

Everything goes to the side.

As a footnote, my family welcomed triplets last year. Got an extra hand? You are well experienced.

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HAHAHAHAHAHA can't be! Your daughter was not expected that answer most likely when you grow understand, I imagine the face of your wife laughing to know that actually that is true

Hahaha o how I remember those days - and sorry to say this will get better until they are teenagers, and then they are done with school, out on the town at night and you stressing and not sleeping and the thoughts of what you did at that age running through your head LOL
Never is anything EVER the same when you become a parent Not even when they are adults), but it is all worth it, even though I am SO HAPPY I can sleep to my heart's content over weekends and eat what and when I will and not have to run a hotel with different meals.... but so we all have our turn and now dear sir, it is yours, so do enjoy.
Is your wife younger than you or did you start a family later in life? You do not have to answer if I am too nosy.

i have become to a big realization now with my humble experience as a daddy, we don't raise kids, they raise/control us :D