I let my son down

in life •  7 years ago  (edited)

I was retrenched earlier this year and I have been battling to find work. My wife got sexually harassed at work and has been diagnosed with PTSD and is unable to currently work.

All I wanted to do was spoil my 7 year old angel for christmas and give him what I could never be given as a child. A happy memory.

Unfortunately I am unable to afford a gift for him and I actually really lost my shit a few nights ago. I sat on the side of my bed and broke. Knowing I have a life policy that would cover any form of death made me feel warm knowing my wife and son would be secure.

Next thing I know I wake up in hospital with both my wrists slit and a MONSTER headache.

I have since been discharged but I am mostly under watch as they feel that I am going to do this again and finish the job this time.

My boy, I am sorry I can’t give you what you deserve. You are an amazing boy, a real gift to this world. I really hope that one day I can spoil you the way you deserve to be.

I love you my boy…

A very ashamed father

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