Because sometimes you just need to slide-turn.

My months-long jonesing to play Mario Kart 64 hit a critical level the other night, and I spent several hours opening boxes looking for my N64. In the process, I found all sorts of neat stuff, and some things that I can put up on eBay.

But no N64. Finally I exhausted all of the boxes where it might be hiding, but alas, no luck. I started wondering if it might be in my dad's old foot locker, conveniently located next to the TV in the living room. I was pretty sure that it was just full of video tapes. Any port in a storm, though. The foot locker was locked, of course, so I went looking for the key. I went to where I knew I had a bunch of random keys stashed. No luck. I tried my hand at picking the lock, which I've successfully done before. No luck there either.

So I sat. I sat, and I thought. I thought, and I remembered a shoebox up in the bedroom closet that contains additional random crap. Up the stairs I sprang! Back down the stairs I sprang upon remembering that I'm not eight feet tall and would require the aid of a step-ladder. Up the stairs I sprang again, step-ladder in tow!

And.

I found the key.

And.

It opened the foot locker.

And!

My N64 was there.

And.

By this time, it was too late to start playing video games.