Honesty is the best policy?

in life •  7 years ago 

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Liar, liar, liar pants on fire! No one wants to get trapped in a lie and appear to be deceptive or dishonest. But does telling a lie actually make you either of those things? Find out more as you read through. The unpleasant truth is, there are some advantage to lying; and they aren’t always for personal gain.
Occasionally, people prefer to lie to protect others and spare their feelings. Because let’s face it, the truth first of all hurts.

Why do we even lie Basically, we all need to take a minute to be honest with ourselves and confess that we all lie. Really? Yeah, trust me. It is in our hereditary nature to deceive and mos times protect.

Yes, we intermittently tell lies to mask up bad behavior, manipulate others, or rise to power and obtain what we desire.

But we also lie to spare the feelings of others, avoid unneeded conflict, or to simply brighten up someone’s day.

Dishonesty is in our nature
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Scientist believe that the act of lying came into play after the development of language. It is the unfolding of delusive strategy, just as animals use camouflage to trick their predators or prey.
In terms of efficacy, lying is the easiest way to rise to power and obtain resources. If your enemy is larger and probably stronger than you, then physical force will not be very active. But if you are able to withstand and manipulate your enemy; not only can you obtain their resources, but make them believe that it was their idea own idea.

In actuality, we are habituated to lie at a young age. Didn’t your parents tell you to always thank your host for that “appetizing” meal that you had to choke down? Public graces aside, it’s still a lie.
Children naturally learn to lie between the ages of 2-5.
''Kang Lee,'' a psychologist from the University of Toronto studied children between the ages of 2-8 to measure the kind of lies that children tell.
As soon as children begin to lie at the age of 2, it is an evidence that they are starting to test out their independence. They lie just to see what they can get away with.
Scientifically, at the age of 8, children actually have the ability of lying to spare the feelings of others. The results of the study actually found that these lies are motivated by compassion and sympathy rather than manipulation and deceit.


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Lying is a reflection of our goals

Most times you don’t even need to open your mouth to tell a lie. A simple facial expression is enough to transmit a lie
Embellishments, aggrandizement, these are the close counterparts to outright lies. But in this case, these lies are almost never malevolent. But in fact, a projection of one’s ambition.

In an experiment carried out by Robert Feldman, he questioned a number of students about their grades and attempt in school. Most of them were false about their actual grades. But instead of becoming concerned as most people do amidst a lie, they became extremely engaged and enthusiastic to boast about their achievements.

We lie if honesty won’t work”- Tim Levine

Is there any difference between moral and immoral lying? If we’re being honest and genuine with ourselves, the answer is a resounding yes. Some lies are well intentioned- meant to safegaurd those who are being lied to.
Lying has even been established to have psychological advantage for the liar. Those who are exceptionally honest with themselves are more inclined to depression than those who are not. Evidently, honest people are often deciphered as blunt, sometimes even pathological
There are even interpersonal advantage to be gained from lying and knowing when it is okay to do so. As a matter of fact, if someone detects that you have lied to them to protect them, it could multiply the trust that they have in you.

These well intentioned lies are known as pro-social lies.

Honestly, lying isn’t so bad.

What really controls the magnitude of the lie is the intent behind it. Lies that are told to safeguard others can actually help to strengthen relationships. Other lies that are told to embellish ones image are debatable inoffensive.

In conclusion, It all boils down to one fact- we all have our motive for the lies that we tell and the facts that we desire not to share. At the end of the day, what we don’t know have no right to hurt us.
Most times a tiny lie is necessary to guarantee that all is well and all runs smoothly.

If this method/procedures works for you, I would love to hear your feedback. Any suggestions, requests, comments, or even sharing how these effect your everyday experiences is most welcome.


Authored by @Oghie


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Lying is a defensive mechanism that a lot of us use to avoid uncomfortable situations

Very true

Lol y'all ladies use it all the time

We do.

Well lesson learnt.

You're absolutely right @belemo

Lying, like every other action, means nothing just by itself. It's all about reasons why you lie (or do something) . There's something called Kant's critique of morality and to make long story short - it says if you walk along the beach and see some kid drowning and you rescue it, it doesn't mean necessarily that you are good man. There are two options, maybe you rescue it because you really felt that and wanted to save one life or you maybe did it because you just expecting reward or something. In first case you are good man, in second you're not, google about it :)
Same thing with lying. Nice post btw :)

You couldn't have said it any better.

I will check out the Kant's critique

Thanks Catherine, I also planned to write about it here, someday in the future :)

You are welcome

Niceee postsss..
Upvote for upvote...

Thanks for your contribution, but you could attract flags your way by asking for upvotes.

Sometimes we just lie as a reaction to a question when he really don't want to respond with the answer. Just a sort of a natural reaction with no realy thought or malice.

But I really do not think we can realistically call lying a natural response of any sort, in fact it is not natural to lie, it may only be by mastery of the art. But psychologically it should be easier to say exactly what is in your memory about an issue and lying requires 'processing' so as to make changes on the information, if you get what I'm saying. I think it is a bad habbit like so many others..

-@yowanetwork

Exactly!

Are you encouraging people to lie

Please read my comment again.

Lol 😂 just kidding you.

Dear friend! Next time also use #wafrica and follow @wafrica to get an upvote on your quality posts!

Yes, there are times when we have to lie, for example to protect people, it is a good lie.
But lying to cover up the mistake is not good, because after that we have to lie again to cover up the previous lie.

No doubts @yusuf89, lying to cover up someone isn't ideal. Thanks for the contribution

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

This is a great method!

Thanks @goodway.

I have lied to protect someone's feelings and it cost me my relationship with the person. Sometimes it works, but often times it doesn't.

wow posts that are very interesting to you, and i really like.
Thanks for sharing @stach

Thanks @semy

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

Thank u back @oghie

That's a unique perspective into lying. When my dog was a small puppy, she had dug a hole in the carpet. When I came home, she was sitting on top of the hole she dug. She didn't run to the door to greet us like she normally did, but instead she was hiding her misdeed. I suppose that was her way of lying to us.

Hahah, really funny, she probably didn't want to make you feel bad.

I generally tell the truth but recently I had to lie to a woman about a terrible meal. She is older and I couldn't break her heart. :(
Joy

I really like this post..
If we look it from religion side lying is very bad..because God hate lie..
Let took Saul as example God destroy Saul kingdom because he lie to him
Sorry I'm not a Bible scholar, I can go far than this lolzzz 😂.
Now a days if you don't lie people going to hate you,all because we like lie than say truth..
In most time by lying is safe people a lot from entering into danger..
In conclusion. In most cases lying safe us than saying the truth...

I wouldn't want to lie this early morning so I just have to admit that we all lie. We lie because it seems like the easiest thing to do. So our impulses respond almost naturally when we are about to lie.

Take for instance, you have promised yourself never to lie again. But on a faithful day, harmed robbers came to your home and immediately your husband went to hide on the ceiling. And you also know that there is high probability that they are going to hurt your husband or at worst, kill him. When they ask of your husband, what will you tell them? I don't have transferred that, do I?

I won't also lie, lie is not a good thing and we should call a spade a spade. It's addictive. It's a shortcut and, hence, we tend to follow that path of least resistance almost too often. Teach a small boy to tell your visitor you are not around. If successful, the next day he'll lie to you he had assignment that's why he didn't come early from school. Whereas, he was playing football with his friends.

Is there any difference between moral and immoral lying?

I won't sailor again, I'll have to admit there are times we lie for the good cause. But how often should we use the as a means of defence before it finally becomes part of our lives?