Please I need your advice :'(

in life •  7 years ago  (edited)

I have been trying to mend things with the man I mentioned in my dating post for the last few months. I wanted another chance since I have feelings for him and I am learning more about life in the west and about proper dating. But he texted me the song , Somebody that I used to know by Gotye

Now I am feeling awful and have been totally depressed. What should I do to get over this relationship and heal my broken heart fast?

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How long are you together, how old are you and what is the fight about?

It has been a year almost. It was very tricky on and off relationship. Apparently I wasn't dating the way it is supposed to be done. I am very straight forward person and I don't understand tricks or unspoken rules. I never was able to understand him. One day he was great and loving the next he was pushing me away. During that time I was also stressed because of my family (They are against everything I am doing now) and also my father passed away and I couldn't go to his funeral. Finally we had a quarrel around January this year he said "so long". I wasn't sure what he meant but I thought that he doesn't want to hear from me again so I stopped communicating with him and he didn't call me at all. I was suffering for few months so my friend told me to contact him one last time and be as honest about my feelings as possible in a positive way. I did that end of June but he was upset that after I broke up with him, now I contact him after all this time to tell him my feelings. He said "Have a good summer and we will talk in September (if we will ever talk)" This was all by text. Beginning of July I sent him an email to thank him for everything and tell him in more details what I feel and that I don't expect from him to feel the same but I wanted closure to the relationship, at least from my side. If he is willing to discuss what went wrong it would be great, at least I can learn from my mistakes. I have been trying so hard to come over my background teachings and upbringing. Its not easy at all. We are both in our mid thirties. Thanks in advance

You seam like very emotional and kind person. My advice would be to make some distance, and dedicate time only to yourself. Read some books by Louise Hay, and learn how to love yourself first. You are more than enough, and deserve only the best. I can't tell you what to do with that boyfriend, but I can tell that you are in pain. You should do what ever makes YOU happy.

Thank you! I will try that

Try to understand that this is just a manipulation trick and try to remember why you're not together in the first place.
Do you deserve better? If yes, then go find it and don't settle for less.

Thank you! You are right I think.
I try to tell myself that I deserve better but nonetheless I am still crying and depressed. I guess I feel misjudged and mistreated despite my efforts to make things better. Its not about him now as much as it is about me and how to get over him.

I hope you heal quickly and find what you're looking for.

Thank you. I hope so too.