Listening to each other, or just waiting your turn?
I would bet that, most never really listen to each. From my experience, (from what I've observed, and experienced) almost all conversation I have engaged in with people, just turn into a oneuping competition. People half listen, while waiting their turn to prove you wrong, or to impede their thoughts on you, just to be right, instead of actually having a therapeutic conversation, where you both walk away from it with something gained.
For the most part, it has to be blamed on ego. I've personally noticed, that it kills people's souls to be wrong about something(Haha), when in reality, it would only benefit you immensely to embrace your wrongness, and add whatever it may be to your mind archive.
One thing to help in this situation, is to understand the shear volume of things you DON'T know , in comparison to what you DO. And that there is a HUGE possibility that both people, may have come to know something that the other doesn't. Being wrong is your friend people, this is the natural process of learning.
Tell me your experiences. Does this happen to you quite often?
Perspective Warp:
Listen to one of the leading Psychology professors give a short crash course on how to actually listen to someone when they are talking to you. It's probably a lot harder than what you think it may be. The video is only 10 minutes long, so give it a watch. It'll probably sharpen you a little, and give you a little bit of a perspective warp. Lol
Jordan Peterson - How to Really LISTEN to Someone
Lets start listening to each other more! The only thing you have to lose is a possible gain.
Thank you for reading my post,and for any contributions made!(Upvotes, comments, follows, and resteems)
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Ill take your advice. Thanks!
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This has inspired me to listen and shut my mouth! Great article
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This is advice I need to take. So many potentially awesome conversations are ruined by me wanting to say more. I usually leave a social interaction feeling like I messed it up, and simultaneously dissapointed that I don't feel heard and understood. A good conversation is a rare gem worthy of gratitude! I hereby resolve to cultivate good listening skills in hopes of finding more satisfying conversation.
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This is so true! I often find myself "waiting for my turn" without actually listening properly. It really annoys me and it's something I'm trying to work on.
Never miss an opportunity to shut up :)
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For the most part i always felt like i was being attacked. I know now it was wrong of me to feel that way
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Yes it also happens to me, you are right. Sometimes i am always eager to wait for the person turn to finish for me to raise my own thought like you have said or to show that i know better than you.
I would also like to contribute on the causes of this.
(1) Ego like you just said, pride people wanting to show that they know more better than you as this case has happen to me also.
(2) Difficultly in admitting that you did not know.
This is also the one of the reason, people never admit that they did not know or rather listen to you.
They prefer for you to finish your owb talking then they raise theirs to show that they know.
So one solution to this is to admit sometimes in conversation that you did not know and try to stay cool, listen and gain what you did not know.
Thank you for sharing this great write up with us
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Nice Extremely relevant article! I find myself in the midst of the best conversations I have thinking "Am I really listening to this person, am I not just waiting for the next moment to talk", but i find that the best way to start to change this behaviour is to recognize is and describe it to yourself, then gradually it starts to shift.
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I can say I'm guilty of this. But well, we keep working towards getting better each day. It's something to really work on. Thanks for reminding me @intrepidthinker
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You are 100% right. Guilty of this. Thanks for sharing. It's an eye opener.
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