Sometimes I wonder if I ever meant anything to you ?
When I once tried to back away , you insisted to know what changed , who changed my mind ?
Those same rules don’t apply to you ? You don’t have to let me know ?
I wonder if you think about me ?
I wonder if you miss me ?
It’s something I’ll never know !
Steepshot
This is totally unrelated, in a way.
When a man marries a woman, they become of one. Until death do us apart, is generally pledged by both. However. There is two experiences that shaped the way I percieved relationships.
First was blood of a cow, as it was sacrificed for food. Now that sounds intense! Well it is. But it instills, life. Then I do not keep a pledge it is blood for broken pledges....
The second was when I was pre teen I was able to visit a few indian reservations. One part sticks in my mind, there where two rocks about fifteen feet from the ground and about twenty feet apart. The guide explained to me, that even if a couple where in love the man was still expected to take the leap before he could be wed. I mean, a great sense of fear eminates from these rocks....
When you think of your husband, ask yourself would he take the jump? Is he really concerned about the sacred oath he pledged with you? Then, answers are present. Peace of mind occurs. Then you move on, and meet some prince charming. xD itll be cool
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My husband has disconnected years ago .... he has been verbally and at times physically abuse and is very controlling ....he’s always out and looking for an excuse not to be home .... I love him ... a part of me always will ... but he’s not changing for the better .... the thing is I have children with this man .... if we get divorced it effects my children in many ways .... but I was willing to deal with it ... although we did go they a period of separation.... not very long ... and during that period I fell in love with someone I thought was my Prince Charming.... after he stuck it out over a year.... even if I told him I come with too many issues ... he still stayed ... then it was worth uprooting my life ... but I took too long to make that decision ... and it seems like while I was telling my husband And family I’m done .... he was pushing me away bc he found someone else . So ... I’m by myself right now ... trying to figure out what I want to do.
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I understand, yet dont at sametime. I have never been divorced so cant relate.
I don't really advocate divorce, unless there is abuse.
Tough one.
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I dealt with the abuse bc I am against the idea of divorce .... I had my husband put a knife to my throat ... and slept in the same bed with him the next day ... bc I don’t like the idea of divorce ...but when he started being out all the time and never really spending any time with the kids and I .... always angry when he did ... i was nice ... it didn’t work ... I stood my ground ... it didn’t work ..... I was not so nice ... it didn’t work .... anything I did didn’t work anymore .
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Right.
One person is not a relationship. My brother and his wife would fight often, at one point as they tell their story as to why the fight began... I calmly reminded them that a facet of parenting is that a good example is set by both parents. Because one day that will be emulated in their relationships. Its okay to get upset, but children see the reaction as well.
Point is, consider childs thoughts as well if they can communicate thoughts well enough. Which would be worse for them and you? How do they feel about that? Etc.
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Well the kids don’t really see any of the fighting. We have made a point to keep that from them .... the only thing they do see is that daddy not home much ( which they think he is at work ) ... and mommy does everything on her own ... ( bc daddy works late ... and Mom leaves work early )
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Makes sense. Alright. Just do what you think is right in your heart. Best one can do at all times =)
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Although since I’ve started chemo , he has been much nicer . Which I would like to think it’s bc he has come to his senses .... but I’m just afraid it’s a temporary thing bc he feels bad for me .... which I hate ... I don’t want anyone’s pity .
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I recognize a lot in what you say.
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❤️
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