Excerpt: In the next two articles I am addressing one of the most prominent notions of the new-age doctrine - to think positive. I am describing the two main reasons why such attitude is actually not positive at all. It causes us to ignore the "dark" yet important aspects of our whole self; it causes us to judge ourselves and remain victims. I am suggesting a more holistic approach to life, one that although not pleasant at first pulls us out of the duality, mass-consciousness, towards enlightenment.
Describing the "positive thinking" approach
Many of us are familiar with the concept ‘positive thinking’ and how we are recommended to implement it in order to achieve good and happy lives for ourselves (google it and see for yourself). Those who are single, for instance, are encouraged to ‘think positively’, to be optimistic; when they attend weddings they are presented to the happy couples so they can witness a positive example and then develop within themselves hope for their own situation. However, what is the truth behind the mantra:” ‘think positive’? Is such pattern of thought really necessary in order to be creators, to enlightenment?
"Positive thinking" is founded on the assumption that the mind can create. "I will think I am rich and healthy and therefore I will be rich and healthy". While this approach may work for a little while and bring some mild results (you will win 100$ on the lottery), for the long run it will fail simply because the mind has no creation powers whatsoever.You think I am mistaken? Try your way, we will meet in 10 years and see who is right.
It's a myth.
The idea of “only positive thoughts are allowed" might actually be harmful because it implants you in the same place for years and years. In order to clarify my point I will use a common situation that may happen at every home:
Danielle, the teenage daughter of Joyce burst into the house through the main doorway and ran quickly to her room, slamming the door behind her. Joyce, who had been too alarmed to leave her young child on her own, hurried after her only to see her daughter’s face buried deep in the thick blanket that already was full of wet tears.
“What’s wrong, sweetheart?”, Joyce was worried. Her hand caressed Danielle’s head hoping her daughter was up to share with her the details.
“It’s Simon….he…he… he broke up with me”, Danielle just barely managed to screen out the words out of her crying mouth.
"Oh, my beautiful…I am so sorry….he is stupid to let you go…you are so sweet, beautiful and talented and you will easily find a new boyfriend”. Joyce was trying to encourage her suffering daughter. “And most important”, she added remembering a good advice she had heard lately, ”it is crucial that you do not fall into depression. Think positive and only optimistic thoughts and you will see that everything will quickly be even better than before”.
But is that really so? Is Joyce correct? Are experts’ suggestions, who repeatedly advise us to think positively – “because thoughts create your reality” – really justified and genuinely bring a true improvement in our daily lives?
The worldview which says that positive thinking alone can solve all our “problems” is archaic and no longer relevant for those who choose to walk towards enlightenment. Such thinking was good when you began to awaken, to be more aware. A worldview that says “think only positive” and “avoid any negative thoughts” presents a dualistic perspective about life. If we live in a dual reality, one that is comprised of contradictions and separations, we doom ourselves to a life that will always swing between “good” and “bad”.
There are two main reasons why ‘positive thinking’ can be actually harmful:
Adopting positive pattern of thought only, inherently causes us to ignore other parts of our reality. If Danielle, the daughter in our example, accepts her mother’s advice she will then avoid addressing the root cause within her that initially have created the situation she is facing now. Any human must go through the process of carving and forming their personality and that includes working with the entire spectrum of their character, including the hidden so-called dark aspects. When Danielle’s mother encourages her to ‘think only positively’ she also pushes her to ignore the inner self-observation that is so vital for Danielle’s growth. Indeed, through the wallowing in the “negative thinking”, in the self-pity, in the pain of breaking up and in her feeling of despair, Danielle may reveal deep truths about life, about herself, her aspects and by that become more mature. Only by digging into the negative aspects of the personality Danielle can win the awareness that will propel her forward in due time towards new adventures in life. Had she focused only in ‘positive thinking’ she would have caused the repression of the “negative” and “bad” thoughts that demand to be known and addressed; else they would be buried inside and in time would surely explode, if not during her next relationship then in the one after it. Life cannot be ignored or put aside, and the “darkness” or the “negativity” is definitely a part of our reality.
The second potential harm that “positive thinking” bears is the rooting of a judgmental attitude towards life, one that believes in conflicts, suffer and anguish. If we divide our thoughts and actions to positive and negative, and consequently we divide the whole world to positive and negative, then we as well, being part of this world, are judged as positive or negative (by ourselves). Therefore, on some days we are experiencing the goodness, that means we live in the light, do a good job in our relationships, send love to our dears and fight for noble (and good) values like peace, brotherhood, and freedom. On other days we give up to the dark, to the “negative energies” and to depression. As long as we are strong enough, determent and exercise self-discipline we place ourselves on the side of the “light warriors” and that makes us feel good. However, if we fall to the other side, to the evil, we begin to feel sorry for ourselves and to scold ourselves for our bad behaviors and satanic thoughts. We then beat our allegedly dark souls and find comfort in affirmations like: “this is a cruel world” or “after all we are just human beings”. Such attitude makes as being victims and takes away our power as sovereign beings. We endlessly see the world through a black and white prism. That in itself disallows us to see the bigger picture of the reality that is needed to be enlightened.
Don't get me wrong - from the duality perspective it's far better to have a positive attitude towards life than a negative one, and if you are insisting on thinking all the time you better think happy thoughts.
I am suggesting a more holistic attitude, which I will explain in the next post.
In the next article (will be published tomorrow) –The benefits of adopting a more holistic approach to life, one that is beyond "good vs bad"; "light vs. dark".
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