Myrtle Fillmore says, “Pray in the good. Weed the garden.”
Looking different, she says through the hypnagogic state,
Doorways to transformation are everywhere,
when diving to the bottom of a dark lake.
What a pleasure to talk with those who have children! Those who understand,
in thunder and lightning!
Receive the sun and the greening of things, transform the spirals in nature,
instead of dying, depressed, no words, dark yesterdays,
the world and the earth, this Jesus!
Ten siblings surrender in hollow and woods.
In the name and way of mastery, I am chastised in the opening for disobeying the laws of “check-in,” even if my words are born of genuine kindness. We are here today with printed blogs, titled LOVE YOUR ENEMY. I’ve underlined a sentence or two, in each paragraph with green pen. There is a truth and lie in all I write in the second page margin. Begin with yourself, I’ve highlighted, but I feel small having had the non-violent communicator turn red and put up her hand in stop-that-now-fashion as we begin the group. Actually, it feels a violent halt—unwarranted, and I check in with myself, will I be coming back?
“Self-love, is the basis of loving your enemy,” the introverted, twenty-something, musician says. And I quickly scribble it down because he seems closest to spiritual in this group.
I think about my friend, Martha and how I’d told her something else about this group demanding I tame my abstract, spiritual views so that they could swallow what I was saying. I backed up, offered simple analogies, further still, I had to create a bridge, even make up some more free offerings in order to get them off their Doberman haunches—loose again on their socialized leashes.
I have been confused about how much and what to share with people. I once worried about giving away information that came my way by living through difficult experiences, years of studying my inner voices, dreams and synchronistic lightings. But, I’ve been encouraged by at least one in my life to just offer up what I’ve got. What I am now finding is that the more I offer—especially those discoveries I’m right on the edge of, the more I am either rudely ignored and overlooked or up for vigilant attack. Tar and feathering for my big ego that thinks it can understand scripture through symbol, that there is a heavenly language and that much of it is readily available to any who are able to initiate themselves and trust the next message to come. Never, do the repeated verbalization of these truths sound as profound and holy spoken because they’re trapped—only a word symbol and an experience that is set up only to be learned. It just can’t be given, even if you want to teach it, but if there are those who are on their own edge—close to yours and you have something to offer and do, it can be the next big clue. For me too! I wait for the magic messengers who come surprisingly from behind the building, in my mailbox or through a random youtube selection. How lucky we are to have so many open channels of communication!