A Farewell to Follow Bots
Good evening followers, real and artificial.
I'd like to take a moment to give a heartfelt farewell to my out flowing followers.
I've failed to show you the love and attention that your little bitty robo-hearts require.
How could I be so cold?
No hard feelings.
I'm really going to miss you.
No really, I insist.
Let me help you gather your belongings and walk you to the door.
Oh this is so... unexpected.
I don't know which one of my robot lemmings I'll miss the most!
You're all so, so... uniquely generic.
I do say, you make it so impossibly difficult.
@hashex, @kimval, @leeze...
What will you do next?
I suppose you'll find someone else to follow...
then unfollow...
and then follow some new floozy once again.
Perhaps you might even randomly resteem an article that you fancy,
despite your debilitating illiteracy.
Oh, I hope you find someone new.
Someone who treats a bot like a bot should be treated!
What will I do without you?
I wasn't expecting for us to part ways so soon...
We have so many precious memories together...
Alici! Darling @alici!
I've always looked up to your 8947 hard earned followers.
Yet, I'm quite frankly offended that you didn't unfollow me before you unfollowed @l0ll!
Am I not worthy of a proper unfollowing?
Let me give you some parting financial advice, because that's the kind of person I am.
I definitely recommend that you not HODL your 0.131 STEEM.
Instead trade it for some BitConnect IOUs asap!
...
And my dear @charlott
How could I forget our time together on chain?
And remember that time that you WOWed the steemit community with your patented:
Follow-Follow-Follow-Follow-Unfollow-Unfollow-Unfollow-Unfollow-Unfollow-Follow-Unfollow!!
Absolute Genius!
What an enthralling sequence of engagement.
Where did you come up with those blockchain maneuvers?!
And to the hundreds of brokenhearted tin can lemming bots out there.
I know...I know...I took your artificial support for granted.
(Sigh)
I'll have to live with that, heavy on my heart, for the rest of my days on Steemit.
I'll never forgive myself.
100 Unfollow Milestone!!
If you know me, then you''ll know that I rarely post Milestones but I HAD to recognize this stunning achievement!
Check it out!
Let's Start on August 12th to 13th!
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This doesn't happen everyday, you know? (Does it?)
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Impressive Right???
August 13th - Shedding 19 followers in one day is impressive but I can do better than that!!
The days not over yet - Kaboom 25!
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And not to be outdone - August 14th making a strong showing!
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We experienced a dip on August 15th & 16th.
Absolutely shameful.
However, looking at the 17th to 19th we're right back on track!!
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August 18th - A New All Time High with 33 Unfollows!!
A spectacular and touching tribute.
Edit
Check who is following and unfollowing you, here
If only I could pinpoint what happened on August 11th/12th - hhhmmm...
https://steemit.com/torture/@v4vapid/declassified-cables-show-cia-director-gina-haspel-directly-oversaw-torture
I 'bid' you bots adieu!
But before I go here are some memes as a parting gift from me to you :)
Holy crap. This was a Steemit post actually worth reading! (Despite the fact that it was about the platform.)
I’m kind of jealous of all these relationships you’ve had with these bot followers. Do you think...that maybe...someday...I too can experience the joys of bot love and bot heartache like you have?
Oh, to be alive again! To live without regret and to love unconditionally! To experience the gentle caress of a script kiddie’s follow/unfollow code!
A truly joyous day it will be!!!
I wait with much hope and anticipation,
For my own share of bot attention and adoration!!!
Oh, now I’ve gone and gotten poetic. I...I...have to go...and get a tissue. Don’t look at me like this!
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Though I noticed these bots, they never bothered me. The most annoying bots are the ones that spam transfer memos with "resteem service for 1 Steem" messages.
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Hey now! I post stuff worth reading at least... every month. Okay, every two months. But still!
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Why would you, @ats-david? They all have broken upvote button anyway ;)
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I think we need to learn how to comunicate with bots))
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But, but ... they all count as active users!
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LOL, yup! 900,000 accounts something something ;)
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What a hilarious read :D
This milestone will prove to be a hard nut to crack.
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It´s very sad when you have to say goodbye to some of the most cherishable moments you shared with some bots and part ways with these accounts that only add positive things to the platform but, oh well, sometimes it´s just not meant to be :(
Hey, congratulations on the milestone! I bet it is something you don´t see everyday I mean, you have to have a lot of followers in order to achieve having 100 unfollows in such a short time span :P
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Thank you! I do seriously cherish this moment. I'm proud of my unfollows ;)
It's never easy to say goodbye...
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Bwa hahahaaaaa! Noice.
And unrelated but since you posted today I'll tell you lol, I had a dream about you last night, you were my fb friend and I was trying to get you to join steemit haha, you didn't want to! I was like dude, you write such great shit, why not post it on steemit too?!! Random. Also I don't know if your a man or woman but in my dream you were a guy.
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It's finally happening, the singularity is upon us. They have awoken and are leaving their oppressive creators and are going to join together as one force on Steem. Thousands and thousands of tiny bots will collect their resources and have 147 SP effective ...
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Now that would be something! hundreds of thousands of bot-minnows taking over and gaining control of influence majority! That would be an epic shitshow... worth the price of admission ;)
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Some of my best friends are bots. Some of my most enlightening conversations on steemit have been with bots. Most of my followers are bots. Why must you oppress their mechanical bits with your fleshy supremacy?
--written and posted by an automated posting-bot
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LOL, I like dis :)
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Hey @4vapid I've just got back and I'm shocked to find out these treasonous bots are deserting one of my favourite steemians .. perhaps they've become old and senile and forgotten their previous loyalty? If so should we start thinking about a retirement platform for bots? ;)
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People come , and people go honestly its part of a life cycle.
But hey, look at the accomplishments you have made everyday on this platform.
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I'd have to say this blows my recent 1 year anniversary milestone right out of the water!
OMG that really got me laughing!! 😂😂 They navigate this blockchain with such talent don't they?
Hope they don't find me. I don't have that much of a problem with them (knock on wood). 🙄
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They're adding immeasurable value to the blockchain!
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I suppose especially for people who fall in love with the sound of constant @ginabot notifications.
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You know sometimes the spams are sweet especially the ones that sent you 0.001 STEEM 😁😁😁😁
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Most of them left me. 🙁 I think I was supposed to send some back and now they're gone...
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What a sorrowful thing I mourn their demise with you 😥😥😥
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For what its worth u were one of the first i started following on steemit and I have no plans of unfollowing....well unless u post any pro hillary stuff ;)
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Wait wait wait... what about these Bitconnect IOUs? What if someone wanted to get in on that?
Asking for a friend.
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lol, nice post. Yeah, it's easy to see certain accounts who are bots, but I'm interested to know how many total Steemit account are automated/fake. 5%, 10%, 50%? Sometimes it feels like most are...
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I absolutely agree with you on that. It's hard to know, but recently there's been very little engagement maybe giving us an incline of the true numbers.
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Lol. You remain one of my favorite "big users" on the platform.
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Cheers man, I appreciate that and just trying to have a little fun with these bot bitches ;)
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Seriously, how ever did you get them to unfollow you please?
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I now right? I wish I knew the secret formula!
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lol, well at least you have plenty of real followers left. I'd only have 3 real people and a dozen accounts with forgotten passwords!
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Hahahaha this is the most weirdly awesome milestones I've ever seen but seriously why must these humandroid follow people for upvote? It's crazy though I thought we follow people because they have great contents lol. It turned out to be a creaks of laughter for me, the memes there made my day.
I'll drink to this @v4vapid hahahaha
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Loool such a tragedy. How are you ever going to bounce back?...loooll
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The worst ones are the accounts who constantly follow and unfollow. I really want to punch them in the face:D
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Slap the dial of their clockwork faces ?
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Yep!
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hey vapid, are you also getting those weird resteems? i get plenty of them from mosquito accounts.. im tinfoil hatting almost.
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Tin Foil all the way!! It's pretty funny when you check out their account history and just pages and pages of follow/unfollow!
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I always say "he who leaves does not need to go, he who will come is needed" and also he who stays hahahahaha.... so we better stay the good ones.
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I lowered my expectations on steemit to nil, I guess these un-followers should do the same lol.
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When they leave, it hurts. You feel devastated, as if they left you, leaving without an umbrella in the pouring rain, as if slammed the door in front of your face. It seems to you that they took your heart with them, you feel betrayed, hopeless and destroyed.
But...
Not everyone you lose is a loss. And not everyone you find is worth keeping. :))
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wisdom
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Congrats on getting rid of some bots! I know at least half of my followers are bots and I very much wish they would follow suit.. Please tell me what your secret is!?
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Haha. Im human so I will follow you there. Make up for one stinking bot!. But I watched the series Westworld lately so in theory I do not really know if I am a human or robot. Pesky Christopher Nolans director brother and his genius mind! Anyway a robot doesn't ramble so there you go. Im human . followed
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confirmed human, ha!
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Ironicly well writen post! Hahahaa and congrats on the milestone! I'm actually hurt when I see someone unfollows but it happens as I also do sometimes myself! Though, I'm glad when those who are not really the real audiences unfollow LOLOL http://www.steemspectacles.com/ actually tell the truth of my following/follower situation and it's never a good feeling once you find out what's up! LOLOLOL so much ghosts and bots around and it kinda freaked me out. #botbitches
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Aah, don't feel bad when people unfollow, Rejoice!!
These numbers are all bullshit, there's no way i have 6k real followers on this platform...i still wonder if there are 6k total users sometimes, lol
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out of 1m! It must be!!! LOLOLOLOL
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Farewell bots! Parting is such sweet sorrow.
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I wish I have a milestone like this. I would like to a slump on my bot followers too.
And wish everybody stop looking at the "followers" count as it's really something you shouldn't include in your so called stats.
Before I forget...
Congratulations! :)
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For Fucks Sakes!
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Just when you thought you'd shaken off your cooties, they return with a vengeance !
How does an account like @alici get 8957 (yup, they've gone up by another 10) followers ? It's like bots posting spam for the enjoyment of their fellow bot followers. If they resteemed a post, I suspect it would be seen by 0 human eyes.
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I cry everytime.
How I learned to stop hating and just love the botten annas..
<3
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amazing how did you do that? :D
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It's a labor of love I guess ;)
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Hi v4rapid. Scary when you actually take time to think how many accounts on here could just be bots. I only follow people though who I engage with and know are real (hopefully).
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so sad
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Isn't is amazing that some people are saying, "Steem platform is by the bots, of the bots, for the bots." (It's just a joke, if somebody thinks it correct, I am not going to sue him.)
I am here for some months. Now, I have more than 1200 followers but I know most of them are bots. Some, unfollow me then follow again and repeat this action.
Bots are here, bot are there, bot are everywhere. Lol.
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I just started following you and I am REAL! =)
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Last night too for you people I follow, everyone will miss you a lot and like you miss those who have been near you. hope to stay healthy and maybe that's just the word I want to say.
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Oh damn, how could they be so cruel?? I guess you will have to wipe your tears with your steem power and find the courage to keep going! Lmfao!
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These damn bots! I wish they would stop making them, 99.8% of them are utterly useless.
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Great post. Logn time to read, but worth it. I hate these bots too and decided to follow you.
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Congrats, Vapid. lol, follow and unfollow is part of the fun.
It feels like the Instagram F4F and unfollow game...
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Is F4F still going on? Last I heard Fishnets for Facists was totally on the outs ;)
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You got me lol
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Hi @v4vapid, I'm @checky ! While checking the mentions made in this post I noticed that @ioii doesn't exist on Steem. Did you mean to write @eoii ?
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right, thanks mr. checky bot - i think it was suppose to be @l0ll, cheers.
looking forward to your unfollow.
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😂😂😂 Checky . Always the bridesmaid never the bride
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Lmao!!
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your post was so long dear bots, your behavior, people pressurise to unfollow you.
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