Skatetown U.S.A. (film): unintentionally hilarious

When I was a kid, skate-parks meant something very different than they do now. We called them "roller-rinks" and it was just a fun place to hang out. They were everywhere and they catered to kids and adults alike. Although I was too young to experience this, many of the skateparks turned into racy nightclubs when it got dark and the kids were forced to leave.

Skatetown USA was made in 1979 and presented a rather over-the-top perspective into this popular locale.

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I always hated disco and thankfully it was finally dying an abrupt death by the time I was old enough to care about music that didn't have Sesame Street characters. However, the roller rinks were still alive and well, but now they had music in them that is, for the most part, used exclusively in strip clubs these days. However, in Skatetown USA, disco is the mainstay of the musical score.

Something that is kind of fun about this movie the stars - some were on the way out and others were just arriving. It featured Marsha Brady (Maureen McCormick), Scott Baio, and in a wonderful turn of events, Patrick Swayze in his first ever Hollywood role as "Ace."

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The film is completely ridiculous, especially now. It is mostly a comedy of slapstick pranks between the two main characters who are roller-skating champions (I promise I am not making this up) as they compete for love and of course a grand prize of 10,000 dollars and a moped (lulz.)

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Although this movie was basically just laughed at and was universally panned, critics actually were saying things like the only redeeming quality of this trainwreck of a film was new up-and-comer Patrick Swayze. Swayze went on to star in loads of blockbuster films and personally, I consider him one of my favorite actors of all time. Of course he tragically died at the age of 57 in 2009.

This movie seems just horribly dumb and makes you wonder why it was ever greenlighted in the first place. You need to understand how wildly popular roller skating rinks were at the time and while disco was on its way out, it still had a very loyal fanbase. This has become a cult classic over the years, many people referring to it as a "70's time capsule."

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I feel as though this movie is definitely worth a look to see the outfits, the hair, the music, and the attitude of the late 70's early 80's that this film kind of captures. I was very young at this point in time but I was alive and have some memory of things like this being impactful on society. Plus you need to understand that while no one knew who Swayze was at the time, Scott Baio was at the peak of his game and almost everyone wanted to see Marsha Brady being something other than the wholesome character that she played on the Brady Bunch. She is a bit of a slut / wild-child in this movie, and a lot of people were excited for that.

Overall, this movie was an absolute flop when it was released. However, due to the fact that it points out a very fun time of Americana prior to really any technology existing I think it is worth seeing, I think Chuck would agree so therefore I give this film the extremely coveted score of....