That musician

in musician •  4 years ago 

I have always been a person who recognizes the bed. In this strange city of Moscow, I seem to suffer from insomnia and anxiety all night. I know the secrets in my heart are turbulent.

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I fell into a deep self-enclosed state, which seemed to be troubled by depression again. I did not open the curtains during the day to cover my inner panic.

I have been in Moscow for more than a week. The job search seems not so smooth. Many companies are so ordinary but so confident. They draw a cake for you, with a basic salary of 7,000 or 8,000, thinking that everyone else is a good meal for others who drink northwest wind.

Seeing oneself, jumping out of the previous comfort zone, in fact, relatively speaking, there is no advantage. It is normal for others to pick and choose. After all, the mentality is not very comfortable.

Some people praise you for being kind, sincere, and unlocking new connotations. Perhaps you are just a fool in their minds.

We expect others to be honest, but we cannot accept the honesty of others to ourselves. People are such complicated and contradictory animals. What sounds good is emotional intelligence, and what sounds bad is lack of heart.

We are afraid of social interaction. We would rather hold an electronic product for a whole day than want to meet with others, because you know that there are not many people who can accept your frankness and live in a virtual world with self-anaesthesia.

Sometimes I blamed my hypocrisy. Later I thought that all people are like this. Sincerity and kindness will make you ignorant.

I think of a musician I met in New York. He plays on the roadside every day. Sometimes it’s a guitar, a broken guitar, sometimes a drum, sometimes even a harmonica, or a bunch of broken guitars. barrel.

I especially like this musician. He is not rich and there are not many people who give him money, but he is very happy every day.

There seems to be nothing in the world to stay in his heart, he will not worry about the future, nor entangled in the past, but will only quietly play his music there.

I also want this state of mind. I think this is the real happiness, not that we find a bunch of constraints for ourselves, put ourselves in a negative energy, and finally destroy ourselves.

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