ASK NOT WHAT YOUR SEXWORKER CAN DO FOR YOU

But let's all be nice and polite and have a good time. These aren't rules, these are only my personal observations. I feel like I have to reiterate these points to real people on a somewhat daily basis while I'm doing my real life job. I enjoy a good list and thought I'd make one. I only wrote this to enlighten and entertain. And I had a lotta fun doing it, so here we go:

😁

Don't ask for bareback sex. I don't care how nice it would feel; I don't care if you can flash me one of those no-reply-nhs texts telling me you've got the all clear. For all you know I could be crawling with herpes. I'm not like, but I could be. It's not about that. It's a policy of mine and any sexworker worth their salt. If you don't respect that, it's not my problem. If you want unprotected sex, get a longterm partner. My body, my rules and essentially, my workplace. You wouldn't just walk into a Wetherspoons and take a shit on the floor (on a side note I did work in Wetherspoons for YEARS and I saw some horrible things haha).

💩

Don't ask to be friends. We're not six. I've met some awesome people – one of the perks of my job – that I just gelled and got on with straight away. We'll have a cam show every now and again but we can actually chat about anything else other than sex and I would go for a casual beer with them. Don't act like a puppy. I can get on with anyone, so just asking me if we could be mates makes me feel uncomfortable – you're worth more than asking for friends. We'll either get on or we won't.

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Don't flaunt your wealth. I've had the impression from a few people that their belief is sexworkers, cammers, escorts.. whatever, always make a ton of money. Like any industry, there are the big earners and part timers and everything in between. I make a modest wage, but I'm self employed, so it depends on how much time I put in. Sure, I can make a lot in an hour.. personally I like the free time sexwork gives me more. 9-5 ain't for me. I find talking about how much spare cash you've got to me distasteful, irrelevant and also, I'm offering a service - I'm a great salesperson, expect me to take you for a fucking long ride.

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Don't call me. Not without arranging it with me first. On skype, my phone, wherever. Just don't do it. I'm not a 24/7 hotline and I don't even know the amount of times I've been woken up by my phone vibrating next to my head, on my bedside table, because people are horny and they really think I'll just answer without at least sorting a payment out beforehand..

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Don't waste my time. Seriously. I like direct, to the point. If you come into my cam room and just wanna chat, GREAT, I like that too. Just please don't make me jump through hoops while you hum and hah about whether you'll pay for a wank with me or not. This is my job. This is how I pay bills, this is how I buy food. If you don't like me, there are literally thousands of other girls at the touch of a button. Also, don't get offended if I don't reply to you straight away. I'm busy.

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Don't disrespect your partner. This one is a bit of a pet peeve of mine, I'll admit. Spend all your spare money on camming and punting whataveya, whatever makes you happy. Just please don't tell me your girlfriend's asleep in the next room, next to you in bed while you type with one hand. As naughty as you may feel, I just feel a bit sorry for her, and you come across as a bit of a wanker.

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Don't forget I'm human. I have a life. I have problems like everyone does. I get an achey back when I cam for a few hours and I get fed up. I can be a massive bitch. I can be great fun though. A decent person, friend, family member. I make mistakes and I make up for them. Don't put me on a pedestal. I don't feel like I'm putting on an act but I can't deny TigerLily is a different person to the real me.

(Did yer ever see such a smug bastard though. That is not candid, it's a selfie. Hell, I don't even know if I would be friends with me)