Yes. I am Here. No Need To Stand Up.

Good evening to you all. I am your newest community member here on Steemit.

My name is OraCool, because I am an oracle. Also. I am cool.

I have the sight. I am also wise beyond imagination— well, beyond your imagination.

I am in possession of more knowledge than you could acquire if you lived a thousand life times, and I am the most humble man that has ever, or will ever live.

I learned about Steemit through a dream last night in the most prophetic of fashions. It was not a dream of my own, as at the time I was projecting my consciousness into one Jessica Alba's dream— for reasons I shall not disclose here today.

In this premonition, I was presented with a purpose, and I have come here to Steemit to fulfill it.

I viewed the introduceyourself posts before I turned on my computer to make an account, and I noticed that it is common for new community members to share photographs of themselves.

I am afraid I cannot do this. I am cursed, you see. Not only am I most wise, most knowledgeable, most humble and most enlightened, but I am also most sexy. Too sexy for an unilluminated mind to gaze upon without suffering serious psychological trauma.

I understand it is necessary to both prove my identity, and to prove that I possess the sight. In an effort to compromise, I offer to the community a drawing of me standing in front of a mirror, whilst my awakened third eye takes a selfie of both he and I.





Viewing me in this medium will ensure that your mind does not fracture from the inability to comprehend how one could be so unbelievably handsome.

Having witnessed my third eye in this portrait, I know that you know that I know you know I am truly enlightened.

Now I already know that you are wondering what my purpose on Steemit is. Be patient, I am about to tell you.

I have come here to share my gifts with this community. To offer wisdom and wit to those out there in need of my altruistic counsel. You know who you are— and so do I.

I know everything. So any question is acceptable.


Here are some examples of what you may want to ask me.


How are you?

Does my boyfriend really love me?

Where did I leave my other sock?

How do I become more like you?

Why are you so amazing?

You can ask me questions anonymously at https://ask.fm/the_oracool

Once I have enough questions from the community, you will hear from me again.

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I already know that you are going to follow me. So here, I shall make it easy for you. Thank you in advance to those of you who resteem this post to help me acquire more questions.

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The artwork is my own. I willed it into existence.