"Each time we make love, I feel pleasure but I do not necessarily reach orgasm. What to do to increase my chances of achieving it" asks Anne-Laure, 42 years old. Dr Catherine Solano, sexologist and andrologist at Cochin hospital, replied.
The female orgasm is not as automatic as the male orgasm. The most common sexual difficulty in men is premature ejaculation, while in women it is more often a difficulty in reaching orgasm. This is why strategies have been studied to facilitate the occurrence of this female sexual pleasure . For this, it is essential to cultivate what is called "the necessary skills" to be able to enjoy more sexual pleasure.
WHAT YOU CAN DO
Stimulate the clitoris during penetration. The main organ of female pleasure is the clitoris. Also, when a woman has difficulty orgasm , it is the latter which must be targeted as a priority, because it is most likely to trigger the orgasmic reflex. It is therefore recommended to explore the most effective stimulation methods, different for each woman: soft or strong, fast or slow, direct or indirect. These stimulations of the clitoris allow half of the women to reach, during penetration , an orgasm that they would not otherwise obtain.
Strengthen the perineum. The muscles of the perineum, capable of voluntarily tightening the vagina play an important role in the onset of orgasm. Thus, making them work regularly increases the ability to obtain orgasmic pleasure. This can be done during sexual intercourse, by enclosing the male sex by internal caresses, or by regular exercises at any time of the day.
Be "active" during intercourse. A passive body, lying on its back while waiting for its pleasure can wait for a long time ... even if the partner activates. Because muscle relaxation, therefore passivity, considerably slows the climb to orgasm. To trigger pleasure, you have to meet it and not just wait for it without doing anything.
Unlock the basin. The active movements most likely to lead to orgasm are those that involve rocking the pelvis back and forth, without moving your upper back. A bit like in some dances considered, rightly, as lascivious. If you feel stuck in the pelvis, you can sign up for oriental dance classes that will free your pelvis and your sexual pleasure.
Do not forget the breasts. Stimulation of the breasts , in particular of the nipples, increases the intensity of the sexual arousal allowing the woman to reach the level where the orgasm starts automatically more quickly. But beware, to be effective, these caresses must last a long time, the maximum efficiency having been observed with ten minutes. And allow yourself to fantasize !
And allow yourself to fantasize! For many women, fantasizing while having sex makes orgasm easier. Little is known, but the brain is an extremely powerful erogenous zone. Each woman must therefore find her own fantasies, that is to say the thoughts which, for her, are the most erotic and the most stimulating. And they are not the same for all.
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