Confession: Chronic Pain is...

in pain •  7 years ago 

Confession: My chronic pain is my shadow.
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I stopped taking my #pain medication last week because it isn't helping and I'm #sick of fighting to have it refilled because it is a "(synthetic) opiate",
#tramadol. 50mg 2xday.
#Insurance didn't want to pay for it again. I'm like: fuck it. I don't want them. They don't work.
My body! my choice!
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So, I'm off pain meds and I feel like shit from #detoxification; But I feel better than I did. Just if just from fading side-effects alone!
I'm done being labeled/treated like a #opiate drug #addict because I tried pain management. my doctors wanted me on the medication. My state issue insurance fights every opiate patient, like they know more about what's best for you than your doctor? They are not doctors!
I have confirmed and diagnosed severe #fibromyalgia and multiple spinal disc injuries and spinal nerve damage. (Among other things) the pain medication did not reduce my pain, after one year. Even with spinal surgery twice.
I never felt comfortable asking for something different, in fear of being labeled a drug seeker.
My chronic pain is my shadow
I will never escape it, I fear.
At least I feel more free.

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It's important this journey you are on and I send nothing but good vibes your way. Living with fibromyalgia is definitely not something most people will be able to relate to. You can't let anyone define who you are but YOU. You can own it. Good luck and safe detox.

thank you. Everything went safely.