Dear Diary: Hopefully I Could Eat Again Tomorrow With My Breakfast Because My Appetite Today Is The S-Word

It seems that my parathyroid medicine is so potent lately as it gives me a total no desire to eat my food. I am just fortunate enough to endure it but the question is that for how long my body could endure is a thing that remains to be seen which I do not want to see because it will definitely mean a bad news again.

I didn't eat today but my breakfast only and those bananas that my mother gave me while I am sleeping this late morning , I had those plus that bun with a small meat filling inside which tastes sweet as well salty which I didn't enjoy eating.

That is all that I had this day and I just ate simply because I needed to eat and not that I am hungry although I do believe that I am hungry but I could not feel it.

At dialysis I could feel the way the dialysis machine washes away the effects of Cinacalcet and from that point I could eat much better. In fact I sometimes could finish the meal that my mother gives me while hooked up.

I will definitely use the additional dialysis sessions soon that will be given by my health insurance but I will have to put a budget for that additional bill charged by the hospital, it is such a thing which will be heavy for my pockets.

It is just so sad that I can only enjoy eating food at dialysis time and it sucks because I prayed to God for my hemoglobin to get normal so I can have more strength, can sleep well which I can thankfully, and can eat well. But things didn't go as expected as I need to take a Parathyroid medicine which ruins everything in my life and the way I wanted to live it.

But I am determined to fight this until the end if I will not be able to rectify this because of some other factors that will arise in the future or if I would die trying. But there is still hope and soon I will maybe enjoy a bit of my remaining life within near normal levels, my God wills it for me.