Single Mom Curation Post! Interview of @wildempress

in parenting •  7 years ago  (edited)

Welcome to my first curation post of Steemit Single moms! In most places in the world, being a single mother is not only a tough job but it is also very stigmatized. I could go on all day about how silly it is to create stereotypes about anyone, so I won't, because I am here to celebrate the coolness instead. Any mom, whether she has a partner helping her raise her kids or not, is a freaking badass. And when a parent has to do it on their own, if they are additionally blogging, working, making art, running businesses, organizing projects, etc... then WOW ok ? If i do say so myself

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I decided to interview people in addition to curating

Rather than just create a list of posts to go check out, I decided to take the time to find some single moms and chat with them a bit, and ask them some questions, so that we can learn a little bit more about their story. By doing this I hope to cultivate community among us single moms here on Steemit, but also I hope to bring awareness to everyone else too!

My first interview is with Wild Empress

She has such a fitting name for this :). We single moms know we are queens, and some of us know we are actually empresses! Wild Empress is a photographer and she likes to play around with self portraits and her work has a really cool feeling to it that is both whimsical or dreamy and very earthy and real feeling at the same time. I love her entry for the Art Explosion contest from a while back..

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Here is her blog! Follow her! Go upvote everything recent :)

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The Interview

Here is her reply to my questions...

I am a self-portrait composite photographer from British Columbia Canada. I also enjoy exploring other art mediums, oil paints, watercolors, digital art... I like to try a bit of everything. But if you follow my blog you will mostly see photography. When I started my creative journey it was really the beginning of becoming single. I didn’t know or intend it at the time but with each creative project I found confidence and purpose. The relationship I was in was extremely unhealthy ( putting it lightly) and while I knew that for a long time I just accepted it because I guess I didn’t have much self worth. Finding my passion for creativity changed everything. Being a single mom for me means staying flexible and always being able to put my kids first. I enjoy Steemit because I can use it in my own schedule. I also have quick and easy access to it on my phone if I want to reply to comments while I’m waiting for my kids to put their shoes on. I haven’t gotten to the point where it is financially significant to me, but the potential is there so that’s nice.

Personally I love being a single mom. I am glad I get my kids mostly to myself. They inspire me and encourage me and motivate me to be myself. We are a bit of a quirky bunch they get me! I haven’t really connected with other single moms because I am so introverted but if I could give them a message it would be this: society loved to tell us who we are... that we are to be pitied that we are lonely or desperate. We do not have to accept that, we can build our own identity. Being a single mom can mean to you whatever YOU want it to mean! For me it is freedom and strength. I honour and respect you all!!

#Thank you @wildempress for taking the time to share about your life!

Everyone, please go check out her posts and give her some love! And here is a tip! If you ever see a crabby tired single mom don't just feel sorry for her! Dont look at her like she is a B word either haha. You have nooooo idea how much we do so cut us a tiny bit of slack if we are having a bad day :) If you want to boost a single mom, remind her of her multifaceted humanity! Remind her being a mom is awesome but also she has so many other amazing powers! Tell her you see her creativity and purpose and strength! Tell her that her kids are amazing and she is doing a good job! Maybe do some menial task for her to lighten her load! And give her a freaking hug! :)

Here is her blog! Follow @wildempress! Go upvote everything recent :)

xo

If you like what you saw, please check out my blog to see what else is new!

Art

Poetry, with audio

Art and a poem with audio


Are you a single mom? Let's talk !

Comment here, or find me on Discord

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Thank you for interviewing me!! Can’t wait to read more interviews with other single moms!! 💕

Your answers were awesome! Thank you also!!! <3

Hi. I saw your post on Discord and glad I stopped by to read. What a fine post! As you stated, all moms are badass but the single moms are simply super! I know our kids give us the motivation and power to go through the every day activities like cleaning up another accident or preparing that new lunch or dinner dish that they refuse to even touch. I admire all moms especially the single ones. I have a supportive partner but even still, my energy is frayed by the end of the night.

You are right about the unfair stigmatization of being a single mom. My cousin once dated someone who could never get over the fact she had a son, who was the same age as his sibling. Needless to say, they separated and she found someone now who accepts her fully. Never settle for less. As a mom, my children are my first and foremost. No one has any right to judge anyone else for parenting. If the child is unkept and malnourished then the mom needs a lot more help from others. Lend a hand. We should never look at anyone with judgment or pity in our eyes.

I will stop @wildempress’s blog next. Thanks for highlighting her. Her photography work is awesome.

Yess! Thank you for saying all this. I never want to diminish the hard work of any mother but also don't mean to compare struggles with any person... I just want to celebrate the often very hidden world of single moms, the part that makes us feel happy and strong. I want to let other people know how great some of it is , and all the cool stuff we learn along the way of having to look out for ourselves and care for our kids. Theres all this dumb stigma around dating too, where a lot of people have assumed I am looking for a baby daddy when it never has been farther from the truth for me (its okay with me if some moms are indeed looking for that! I wish it were easier to just want what we want without having to explain, haha) Anyways I always have dated on the side of my home life, and rarely have brought my dating life very close to my son. He has met the people I date, but I don't make him have to hang out with them or play family. I did that once and it was disastrous for me, and so I just never want to again. Anyway that can be the hardest side, is when a single mom is seeking romance or partnership she is taught to feel ashamed for having those desires, when committed coparenting couples go on dates and have sex and everything all the time with no shame! I have learned to not let this stigma bother me but it is there none the less. Another one is on the rare occassions where I go out late at night on a weekend, people used to always ask me where my son was. I would just tell them "He is out in the car" LOL. Its more fun thinking of the cool stuff people do than getting too bogged down by the negative. But the negative does exist!

I just want to celebrate the often very hidden world of single moms, the part that makes us feel happy and strong.

Very well-stated. I love that you are highlighting the author (in this case @wildempress) on her talents and inner beauty (of which she has an abundance of), not on the fact that she is a single mom and deserves the recognition for this fact alone.

Theres all this dumb stigma around dating too.

So true! All the things you mentioned, I witnessed my cousin going through it too. WTH people!

When I first came on steemit, I read a post about someone advising guys to stay away from the single moms. In that person's opinion, single moms will always choose their kid over the guy and it's not worth them dating one. I agreed with him on single moms choosing their child over the guy, of course they will! Every mom would do that, single or not.

Idiotic author. I left a polite enough comment that we will agree to disagree on this topic matter.

Anywho, it really is great what you're doing. I glanced down and saw you're looking to interview the single dads too? Hehe, awesome!

hahahaha that is the dumbest double standard i ever heard. Like if we forget our kids in the car to be with some guy they hate us, but if we hire a babysitter they hate us too. Jerks.

btw, I loved your comment about leaving the kids in the car. Lol. Can never win with some people.

hahahaha i just think its all so rediculous. They make THEMSELVES into stereotypes all saying the same thing over and over again ... repetition doesnt make it true! Also i am in a silly mood right now dont mind me lol

Be silly away. :) It's good to poke some fun at things. Or you'll go crazy at all the dumb things people think or do.

Haha, and I’m sitting here thinking , yes guys leave me alone’ I personally couldn’t be bothered with dating at this point in my life. I got all the things to do. 😋

I AM GRATEFUL.....RESPECT. I am going to resteem, hope ya dont mind.

Thank you! Of course I don't mind hahaha! Please do!

Great idea! I'm not a mother, but I am a single dad. I've thought about blogging on that too, but haven't decided how I'd do it yet. Love seeing ideas like this that help build the community! Keep it up :)

In my original post i made a call out to single dads too! I thought someone like you might pop out and say HEyyyy What about meeeee ! :) I would love to feature you in a post. I am saying single moms because I am one but I am not wanting to be exclusionary. Lets support each other! <3 I have interview questions I am asking people, is it okay if I DM you?

You should definitely blog about that! I know only a couple single dads and their experiences and stories I’ve heard are definitely challenging and unique!

The life of a single parent. So many stories lol

@wildempress are they steemians? Lets include them ! :)

No they aren’t on steemit, I will mention it though and see what happens

Infinite Lovewaves to all the single moms out here on Spaceship Earth.

This is wonderful @dflo and I'll follow her blog. Left you an upvote! I know it's not much but you have my deepest gesture.

Lovely photos and thanks for the inspiration @wildempress

The mother, is a person who does not have never asked for the service in the care of her children. The first person who always give you motivation to his children.
People are always giving refuge to his son.
So until now in command that's just mother's day. Not The Father.

I love mum, mine was a gem. Sending out loves to all the single mum here. I pray for strength to keep doing what you know how to do best.

Gahhh! This is such a great curation idea!

Her photos are absolutely amazong too. Everyone really should follow her.

💕💕thank you

You are both amazing!!

Yes i am a single mom. This is something I rarely tell persons. The stigmatization from the society even family and friends can be disheartening. But it is a tough world and only the tough will stay afloat. It feels good being in the midst of fellow single moms.

esttyb I understand this very much! Especially when our children are young. If you like you can join us in this Discord chat. https://discord.gg/tess5Ve Have you used Discord before? This is a chatroom place that is dedicated to feminism so if you dont agree with it that is okay. I would still like to interview you even if you dont join us in the chat. I would like to support you best I can with my small account, here at Steemit! <3

Thanks alot. Will checkout the chatroom. Feminism is something am interested in. It's like a banner over women. Feels good to be here.

Ha - Brilliant! Freakin love this! I hope one day you will bless me with an interview too!

Yes!!!!!! I just got super busy again but would be stoked to!

awesome! Well this week is crazy for me still. but we can look from next week onward :D