Another great debate is underway here at my house, this time the topic is about how our daughter is going to get her education.
I'm all for unschooling her, my other half wants her to go to the local school.
I am an alternative type. Some people may refer to me as a hippie. I tend to go through the alternative route for pretty much everything these days.
I cosleep with our daughter, she's unvaccinated, I am following her lead with when she's ready to wean, I use food and homeopathy as medicine. It just follows my logic to stay on the same road we're travelling with her and not send her to school.
Sending her to school doesn't feel right to me. I don't want her to learn things based on a curriculum that has been dictated by the government. I don't want her to learn things from them. I don't want her to learn how to do things and to fit into their box.
I believe that she will be able to learn more at home. She'll learn life skills. I'll be dedicated to her and she's going to get my full attention. At school she'd have to fight with 26 - 30 other students for the attention of one teacher.
I want to encourage her to question things, to have the time to work through problems and not have to stop just because a bell rings. I want her to explore, to pull things apart and put them back together. I want her to be exposed to a wide variety of what life has to offer. I want her to love how to learn. I don't want her to start to hate learning. How many times have you heard children say that they hate school? I don't want that for my girl.
I also don't like the idea of sending her there and not knowing anything about the teaching staff. I won't know her teacher and what their values are. This person can have a huge influence on their students. I understand that the majority are good people, but I had a bad experience with a teacher and I don't want her to have that.
I don't want her to be put into an artificial environment (a classroom segregated with peers her own age) and have potential to be damaged by bullying or unkind words. Where else in society (apart from school) do we interact with people in the same age group and the only interaction with adults are when they're in a position of power. It's not the real world.
I don't believe that making children do things that they don't want to do, especially when it can cause stress and anxiety, is good for them. I don't believe that those are the type of lessons that help children grow.
I found this quote while I was looking into unschooling in New Zealand. "It’s not our job to toughen our children up to face a cruel and heartless world. It’s our job to raise children who will make the world a little less cruel and heartless.” – by L R Knost.
My partner doesn't agree with me. He thinks that she should go to school. His only argument is that he doesn't want her to miss out the social aspect. I understand where he's coming from, but I believe that there's other things that she can attend to meet kids and make friends. He's adamant that it's not the same and she'll miss out on making friends that she will know for life. I disagree. I think we will be able to find other like minded parents who are unschooling their children too. We can get together with play dates. She's not going to be stuck at home with me and never allowed to leave the house!
Does anyone have any advice for or against unschooling children that they're willing to share? I'm not giving up on my dream to have her unschooled. I have a few years yet. She's turning 1 in a couple of weeks, so there's time to win the argument.
References:
https://www.nchenz.org.nz
Have you seen any of @lexikon082's "questions with wolf dawg (his 7 year old son)" videos?
This one includes some questions I asked about home schooling
https://steemit.com/education/@wolf-dawg/questions-with-wolfdawg-a-7-year-old-answers-your-questions
Wolfdawg seems a very well socialised child to me
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Thanks so much for this! I'm going to take a look at it now and I'll get the other half to watch it too. Thanks very much for posting the link, I appreciate it.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
No offense to your husband but the socialization argument is not a valid argument. Unless you plan to never leave your home your child will be socialized, and most home school children are better socialized because they can socialize with all age groups. Older people all the time comment on how well behaved and respectful my children are. And they have no issues with socializing.
I have a ton of photos to prove my kids have no issue at all with friends and friends their own ages and other ages too
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Hi, I've heard that about children who are home schooled - that they're better socialised, more respectful and better behaved.
We have friends whose kids don't even say hello or thank you etc. when we go visit. Even if we take them presents on their birthday we don't get any manners from them. Definitely won't be like that for my girl!
Thanks for replying, I appreciate it.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
I think you should follow your instinct. You have plenty of time to convince your partner she can learn plenty of stuff at home at her own pace and be happy.
My youngest child never went to school and I'm quite happy with his development. Sure, he doesn't have 'school friends' and he is aware of this. He's read a lot of these modern books that revolve around school kids and their life, so that's how he knows. On the one hand, he'd like to have such friends, but, one the other hand, he doesn't want to go to school.
As a parent, I'm doing my best to take him to all kinds of activities for children, so he has contact with kids his age. Also, I know these are 'enforced' frienships and they generally won't last, and the price for having a pal is far too high. The damage school would do to him, it's just not worth it!
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Thanks for your advice. I appreciate it. I'm glad that I have years to win him over yet. It will be a hard one to convince him but I'm going to give it all I've got!
That's very interesting about your youngest. I'm sure he won't miss out on not having school friends. I keep in touch with my closest friends from school maybe once a year at most. Life moves on and new people come in.
Thanks for replying 😊
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
I am not a parent myself, but have been privy to a similar debate that happened in a dear friend's household. They tried homeschooling/unschooling for his kindergarden year, but it didn't work out for them. However, when it came time to look for a school, they found a charter school that fit his needs--much smaller class sizes, classes grouped by a multi-year age range, and scheduled time every week for the kids to pursue their own interests (which the teachers help design lesson plans around). Keep having the conversations with your husband, but also keep your eyes and ears open to what kinds of schools may be available in your area. There may be something out there that fits your family when the time comes.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
That sounds amazing, I'll definitely look into seeing if there's a school like that close to us. That sounds like the next best thing so wouldn't be so bad having to send her to a school like that. Thanks for the comment, I really appreciate it.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Schools aren't all bad :)
When my oldest was tiny, we had a similar discussion in our house. We had the same setup, I had just discovered this thing called homeschooling and prior to that public school had just been a given. I expected to have a huge and possibly emotional fight on my hands.
All I really had to do was mention interest based/tailored learning and he was sold. It helped that I didn't do well at school because I don't have the right brain for it and he did extraordinarily well at school but was bored out of his mind and both of us felt it a bit of a waste of 12 years of our lives (me in particular, it hurt XD And if hubby is the big paranoid type that needs to go with what society dictates because reasons/acceptance you can always point out that hey the school is RIGHT THERE and if homeschooling doesn't work out for whatever reason the school is RIGHT THERE. You're not stuck in it forever :)
And if he wants to see an example of how it works in real life you can always point him at my monthly blogs (I have skipped July because July kinda sucked, will start on August at some point in the not too distant future hopefully).
And you know what bubs will be fine whichever route you end up going. Something about having very mindful and conscientious parents XP
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Thanks so much for your wise words. I know in the scheme of things that it's not the worst thing in the world if she does have to go to school. I'm still going to try to get him to see my point of view though.
I like the argument that school is still going to be there if homeschooling doesn't work out. It's also true the other way that if she goes to school and it's not working we can pull her out, although might be a bit harder with the exemptions going that way.
Yes, I'll definitely ask him to read your blogs, I've found them intriguing and love the idea of having a life like yours. Life seems much nicer when you're free and not stuck going to school.
Thanks so much for your comments and reply. I find you're very helpful and full of wisdom! I appreciate it, as always.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
The argument against always comes back to the social aspect. Your argument in every other category is spot on. Social is overrated. I would rather she get her social interaction in other ways. You are right, as soon as you get out of school, you very rarely have contact with your so-called "friends" in school.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Hi, thanks for replying. Yeah, it seems to be the standard argument. I told my sister that I was hoping to homeschool and that was the first thing she mentioned. I guess it's valid to a point but I'm thinking of the bigger picture.
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Congratulations @ecentrally! You have completed some achievement on Steemit and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :
Click on any badge to view your own Board of Honor on SteemitBoard.
For more information about SteemitBoard, click here
If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word
STOPDownvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit
Yay!
Downvoting a post can decrease pending rewards and make it less visible. Common reasons:
Submit