Foolproof Guide on how not to Get Up-Votes on Steemit

in parody •  8 years ago 

  • Submit a Story
  • Tag it with a hot tag regardless of content
  • Send 0.001 SBD to @berniesanders @smooth @ned @dantheman @blocktrades or any other whale you can think of and tell them how great your post is.
  • PM everyone on rocketchat and tell them about your great post.
  • Go on trending and Spam a link of your post in the comments of each trending story.
  • If after doing all that, you did not get any up-votes, then this guide has worked for you.

Enjoy
@joseph

Authors get paid when people like you upvote their post.
If you enjoyed what you read here, create your account today and start earning FREE STEEM!
Sort Order:  

I would then add the following to your list:
find whales on twitter and Tweet them your story.
Join every Steemit Facebook group in existence, including Steemit China and Steemit Russia.
Place one post in each group and write, "Check out my new awesome post" then put your link with it.

I thought you are the expert on getting upvotes not the other way around hahahahaha
did not even know there was such thing as Steemit Facebook groups lol

Here are all the FB Steemit groups I'm currently a member of. We use them when we are violated, harassed and also when other people too scared to come forward are being bullied on steemit. But mostly, I use it to help me find posts I'm interested in reading. I find some there and then I go on Steemit to read and upvote. It's a way to cut down on endless scrolling.
Here's the groups:
We love Steemit
Steemit Users
Steemit (professional page)
Choose Yourself Steemit Group
Steemit Upvotes
and I think a few others. I use Steemit Users the most though because piedpiper and thealien are in there along with other original homies.
Facebook still provides a safe haven for those who do not feel safe in here disclosing what is currently going on.

hmm this dickbutt messed up the conversation. Is this something new?
I am tempted to go dickbutt some trending stories just for laughs.

Hmm these @stellabelle comments usually get traction. Hey people please check out my profile @contentjunkie follow and upvote my posts.

Am I doing this right?

Also, dickbutt

What's the over/under on days until @dickbutt gets essentially banned? ;)

I've got a better and more family friendly novelty bot in the works. People will forget about _ickbutt before long. Much lawlz will be had with much less dicks on butts.

any chance I can get a copy of the code lol, this is hilarious.

Twatbot? haha

Josheph anyone is free to have the _ickbutt source code. I posted it here but that code doesn't do the random image. I just added a file with urls and it randomly picks one. Send me any other _ickbutt urls you want added.

https://steemit.com/steemit/@contentjunkie/how-playing-with-dickbutt-showed-me-a-nasty-steemit-bug-for-new-users

A Rez"erection"? haha

just followed ...thats all I do these days but wondering how many more am I allowed :)

And if tweeting doesn't work, maybe they just missed your tweet and want to see it on instagram or snapchat or facebook. Because it can't be that they are annoyed with every other post begging for upvotes. It's not like that many people see a whale nipple and latch on for dear life. The people that do this have the most quality game changing content! :)

you dickbutt

Then complain that steemit doesn't work and that it is not you, but others who are not seeing the value you bring.

Pay special attention to not shorten the url when you are link spamming and make no reference to anything in the blog post that you are "commenting" on.

Act shocked and outraged when someone flags your spam and go on a rampage against them even though your small reputation prevents you from doing damage.

Upvote all comments you make, because why would you upvote others content when you can just upvote your own.

Upvote all comments you make, because why would you upvote others content when you can just upvote your own.

I feel like I've heard this somewhere before. ;)

Not in this universe haha!

83 upvotes right now. Im gonna set the over/under on how many got the sarcasm at 55.

What's the payout? I keep getting upvotes when I'm not following this guide. Driving me crazy!

I can't stand begging anybody in my life so fuck it . I will not start now :)

I see your point but you don't have to beg. Think of it as advertising.

ha ha ........ and you can also make down your steemit reputation to minus by following this method :D

That comes as a bonus :)

triple bonus haha

Parody aside, that's good advice to bear in mind.

Next you have to write a post on how to not get upvotes on your comments. :)

Larry: Hey, where's your dignity?
Moe: Spread out.
Larry: Where's your dignity?
Moe: [Slaps Larry] There it is.

Larry: dickbutt

@joseph

How would people get noticed otherwise though? At least regarding the post advertisement, people have to go through it in the beginning.

  ·  8 years ago (edited)

Actually there are guides on how to get up-votes, this is the guide on how not to get up-votes, so you are asking the wrong person. :)

Edit: dickbutt

I'll be following these tips for now on. I'll be a blue whale in no time!

Good guide.
Thank you
I'm glad I don't follow it.
I actually enjoy my upvotes

Great guide,i'll do it.

haha... good story

what is rocketchat?? lol :D

you were missing that final touch Eh ? :)

no i don't do any of these mentioned above? ..cept I DO submit a story lol that is the one thing I am guilty of! submitting content!

just never heard of rocket chat! :D

Hahaha, classic!