As a separate self you're stuck in the game. There is no escape. The prison can be a hellish place or it can be quite comfortable. Thing is, you have a life sentence and there is literally no way out. No chance for escape, no Shawshank Redemption. THIS is the first step ... to totally accept this. Of course it is highly unlikely that you will. The game is set up in such a way that taking this position is virtually impossible. In the game we are deceived and are delusional. We believe in, and get a kick out of, survival. We spend our time thinking up more and more novel ways to feed our needs and we'll, at least, tolerate others around us who help us feed those needs. Of course clear dominance of others in some way also feeds those needs - the need for self-importance is perhaps the most important need of all! We have eons of history behind us and so we use the same hammer we have used for eternity to drive the same nails into the same coffin that is our life. The beauty of how this game has been set up is we don't know it is our coffin and most of us don't care. We are game players you see ;)
The greatest spiritual advancement of the last 200 years has been Darwin's Theory of Evolution. He woke up and saw the game! It is everywhere - no more delusional bullshit about some teleological principle at the end of time drawing us inevitably into it's loving embrace. No! We divide everything into good and bad ... living lives of quiet desperation (bad) - waking up and living consciously in the moment (good). Hollywood and the entertainment business feeds into this myth with endless stories of good people (men mostly) triumphing over evil. The first step involves accepting that there is nothing you can do to change your life from quiet desperation to living consciously. Nothing! Everything you do will be a product of, and a contributor, to the game.
You are at no 'level' of evolution. You are intrinsically no better or worse than anybody else. You are merely a product of context. Change that context radically and you would change radically. Accept that fully and it is the end of judgement, of yourself and of others. Of course the game must be played. In the game there are real consequences and it would be pretty stupid to try to stop playing wouldn't it? So trying to stop playing is ... part of the game. It is inescapable and there is no guarantee death is an escape either. Pretty depressing right? Depression is a powerful pointer that we are moving closer and closer to the first step. The Dark Night of the Soul is a litmus test that indicates you are beginning to wake up. This truth is cold and hard and cannot be sugar-coated in any way. It is the incredibly bitter red pill. The overwhelming majority of humanity will not swallow it. This is what stops people from waking up. It is not due to the fact that the truth is hard to get. It is because nobody actually wants to get it in the first place. They'd rather go around looking for self-righteous people to hang around with and pretend 'they' through their self-appointed guru know something the rest of humanity doesn't. Same hammer ... same nail ... same coffin.
Taking the first step is ... waking up to the machine-like aspect of the dream. Seeing this unstoppable force of nature for what it is ... a game. This changes the quality of the dream. You begin taking it, and yourself, a little less seriously and start playing it (you have no choice but to continue playing) with a bit more of a light touch. These subtle changes in perspective make all the difference eventually.