My Take on Mindfulness

Hey gang, today we’re talking mindfulness, the cure all.

Well, not really a cure all, but close enough! Mindfulness is a fantastic way to overcome or improve almost any problem we may be facing in our lives, whether it’s advancing career, learning new skills, or developing an amazing sex life, mindfulness can help in every area of life.

In my next article I’ll go over a few methods that I use to practice mindfulness. These are good for just about anything, being mindful or present is a great way to see things in a new light. But first, a little about what mindfulness is.

What does it mean to be mindful?

To me, mindfulness is a deep listening. When we’re working to become more mindful, we’re training our listening, and I don’t mean just our hearing. It’s about paying attention to every part of the present moment. This is difficult to do when we try to focus, so instead of straining and striving to pay attention to every sight and sound and feeling, mentally churning as we label, identify, and tell ourselves how things are, it’s best to remain relaxed, and unworried. Simply notice and observe.

As Adyashanti says, “rest in awareness.” Sit back and take in the world, allow it to be as it is. We’re resting, not grasping or avoiding anything. Just let things -thoughts, sensations, perceptions - come and go, just observing them. No expectations or anticipations should affect our actions. You don’t have to be motionless either, see what it’s like to observe yourself as you move.

Resting in this awareness, life starts to reveal itself: our problems, where they stem from, and the solutions most available to us in our present experience. When we start receiving life’s communications, we start to see the flow of life. Eventually we might start to notice what the whole show is all about.There are times where we get so caught up in our heads, thinking we know something or everything about a situation, or that we are right or something is wrong. This is where we start to miss life’s signals.

Problems, Causes, and Solutions

There’s always a reason for the problems that develop in life: your back is killing you because you ignored the early warning signs and kept sitting with poor posture. Your relationship is crumbling because you aren’t noticing your partner’s needs. You’re broke because you’re buying too much shit you don’t need (I personally have a kombucha addiction). The first step in solving problems is always being aware of them.

For every problem in our lives, there is a solution as well. We just have to pick up on the signals and hints life is throwing at us. Sometimes the solution is simply to stop doing the action that causes the problem, but sometimes we have no control over the cause. That’s ok though, there is always something that can be done to ease suffering.

Sometimes it won’t be fun, sometimes it won’t be what you expect, and sometimes it won’t be easy to see. Everyone has their own strengths and experience, the best action(or inaction) to take will vary for everyone.

For example I’ve struggled with muscle tension and tightness for years. Growing up I did a lot of sitting and living in other worlds. Video games, books, tv, movies, even school, they’d mentally take me out of my environment, and so I didn’t notice or listen to my body. I developed terrible posture and my movement mechanics were awful. I had plenty of facial and mental tension too.

I never felt comfortable in my body, never felt free to move how I want to move. I didn’t understand why until recently. It took me years of developing that mindful awareness, and applying it to my body. Now when I’m sitting or walking or moving, I can feel where I’m off. I just remain open and listen, even when it's painful, especially to painful.

Life is throwing us hints, sometimes yelling at us to wake up to the things that are harming us. Whether we pick up on these hints, however, is up to us. We don't have to listen. But leanring to is a fantastic skill to pick up, because sometimes we like to avoid the parts of life that are uncomfortable. We all have the same potential to reconnect.

Photo by Kevin Bluer on Unsplash

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Resolving Issues

Whether it’s muscle tension from poor posture and ergonomics, emotional stress from events, or mental stress from home and work life, most of us are aware of our problems and damage.

For example, I personally have stress from work (desk jobs are bad for our health, sitting in chairs, lack of sun, lack of movement), home life(me and my girlfriend just had a baby, I recently bought a house), and emotional blocks built up from my past(low self confidence, suppressed emotions)

I try to find these issues as they come up, if my body hurts I ask why, if I’m stressed out I take a minute and see what I’m fighting. Usually I’m arguing with the way things are and need to let go of holding onto the way I wish things were.

Once we take the time to observe where we are hurting, to explore every part of ourselves and do a check, we can see what’s wrong. The key is to accept the pain, to look at the pain directly and accept it. Accept the things in your past and present that you feel are unfair and move past them. Otherwise we are going to remain numb and shut out to certain feelings, we’ll live with chronic pain or chronic anxiety that we continually try to avoid with altered posture or try to mask with drugs. We’ll go through life afraid or worried, blaming certain factors for the way we feel.

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Let me know your experience with mindfulness. Have you experienced any benefit from looking into your stress and pain? Have you found more joy from experiencing the present moment more fully? Do you have a different meaning for mindfulness?

As always, thanks for reading!