Toys: to be or not to be

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It is difficult to maintain a sense of proportion in the modern age of abundance. This applies to everything: from food, to cars and yachts (who has enough for that). Today I would like to talk about children's toys. After all, it's no secret that manufacturers deftly play on children's feelings and "hangers".

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We have a certain toy selection system at home. Unfortunately, we did not come to it immediately. But it's better late than never. On the older child, we, like all young parents, conducted many "experiments". Some were successful, some not, such is the difficult part of older children.

Since the birth Artem had a lot of toys. A huge number of rattles, squeaking animals and other irritants of the parental ears settled in our house and began to seize the whole space. Then the rattles turned into toy cars, not always of good quality, and all other sorts of "boyish charms". And it happened strange, the child stopped playing at all. Just scattered all over the room evenly, running and screaming. And even new toys did not cause delight and could only take 10-15 minutes.

Then my husband and I realized that we had to change something. First of all, we decided to dramatically reduce the number of toys, approximately in four times. We threw out bad quality toys, all the broken (even a little bit) toys. Then we conducted an "evaluation of utility" and realized that somewhere we turned the wrong path. Artem was misunderstanding about the situation in about two weeks, Lisa in turn is already growing with this and perceives as the norm.

What have we done and what system are we trying to adhere to:

• Left only useful toys. They selected on the principle of "what can this teach the child?" So we lost almost all swords, pistols and other items that develop only aggression.
• Began to choose on the principle of "not much, but better". If the quality of the toy leaves much to be desired, poor quality plastic, the paint remains on the hands or it falls apart in parts right in the store, then we do not take it. No tears, tantrums, extortion of the child will not convince us of this.
• We have a lot of puzzles. And if before the child did not sit still, then for their collection, he can spend up to an hour.
• Toys should be age appropriate. Well, I do not need a radio-controlled helicopter for a three-year-old child, dad one who needs. A two-year-old girl does not need a collection of Barbie, she just does not understand its value.
• We do not buy fashionable toys from cartoons. First, they are unreasonably expensive. Secondly, do not carry any semantic load. Artem does not ask for them, just because he does not watch cartoons on TV. There are two of our oversights: "Outbreak and miracle machines" and "PAW patrol". But here we learned to negotiate and offer an alternative.
• Agreed with relatives and friends about what they are present (as far as possible). On birthdays, I always give a wishlist, based on our principles and child wishes. And if it was easy enough with friends, then for the relatives we automatically became "monsters that deprive children of childhood". For almost 3 years the situation has improved slightly, but still it is necessary to explain and persuade several times. But we do not give up, because this is one of the principal themes for us.

What did this give us and how did the children change?

• They became calmer. First of all, this refers to Artem, but also by Lisa you can see an unhealthy overexcitation at a party from the number of toys. And it's not because we do not have much at home, but because the child can not decide what to play with and starts to get nervous.
• Children can take care of themselves. They come up with games with pots, chopsticks, leaves and other materials. That, in turn, develops imagination and creative thinking.
• When there is a few toys and they are all of good quality, then the children "hang" for a long time, they can spend hours gathering LEGO or playing the IKEA's wooden railways.
• Toys have become more appreciated, which also follows from "not much, but better".
• We live in an apartment for the family, and not in the nursery. Toys "live" only in the children's room and rarely travel around the apartment.
• Children began to be interested in books.
• Toys have become desirable. The joy of acquiring and owning a dream came back.

My conclusions about toys, and on many other aspects of education, confirmed russian child psychologist Larisa Surkova. Her article "How many toys does a child need?" spread out all my thoughts on the shelves and prompted more decisive actions.

Next time I'll tell you about our relationship with gadgets and cartoons =)

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