Some say the pen is mightier than the sword; I say its mightier than a nuclear warhead. I have wielded the pen to shape my destiny. The power of words has the ability to effect positive change; and in my own life, I have leveraged its magic to aid me in desperate times. I even used it to escape probation...but first I have to share a little backstory.

From Drug Dealer to Paper Prisoner

In 2009, I was arrested and charged with possession, intent to deliver, and manufacture of a controlled substance. The chemical in question was MDMA (On the streets they called it ecstasy): I possessed about 500 of the little disco biscuit bastards---not an insignificant amount.

For anyone unfamiliar with the story, I also had a smorgasbord of other rainbow-colored pills and powders. It was a veritable feast for the drug fiend. Men eventually came into my abode with a warrant, machine guns, and a nasty demeanor. Turns out some folks dislike drug dealers. It goes without saying I easily surrendered. That was the smart move. Who wouldn't? After all, I was unarmed because I was a hippie with big dreams and a limited amount muscle mass.

I was transported to the local jail, locked in a cage, and issued a freakishly insane bond. I think it was $7,000 for me to make bail. My family saved me. They did not have the money, but they found it. I believe they did it out of love. That is what I really believe, even though some of them gave me shit and castigated me for my transgressions. Ah well. It is ancient history now.

In the end, after hiring a smarmy and greasy and effective attorney, I was able to dodge a 40 year prison sentence. Since it was a first offense, the attorney sweet talked the judge into handing me 10 years deferred adjudication probation. I am sure it took a few cocktail parties and behind-the-scenes cajoling to get everything worked out. I am happy for the turnout, even if everyone screams not to take plea agreements. I am not saying that wisdom is wrong; but in my case, it was an unfortunate necessity.

Probationary Experience

The dopest thing about the whole story (no pun intended), was I ended up only spending 5 years on probation. Do not get me wrong, though...probation was hell. I know prison would have been worse, but paper prison was no joke.

I had to complete some several hundred hours of community service. In other words, I mowed lawns, moved furniture, painted buildings, waxed floors, and swabbed the decks all for zero compensation for several years. I was chattel. Agents of the State also routinely visited my house and made me piss in a cup. They observed every intimate moment of that act.

Sometimes they did this at awkward hours, like at midnight. I would be in my pajamas, readying myself for bed, and probation officers would burst into my apartment with bullet proof vests and a derogatory attitude. I managed this for years, while living in utter terror I would slip up and be placed into a concrete box.

My Letter to the Judge; Escaping Probation

After five years of dealing with the trauma of probation, I realized I could get off of probation early. I was told I would need to hire an attorney again to expedite the process.

However, I learned through word of mouth I could write a personalized letter to the judge. It did not happen often; but if the judge liked a letter, he could choose to release probationers from their compulsory duty. I did not want to pay for an attorney again. I knew I had some talent with a pen. I tried my luck. Below is the copy of the letter I wrote:

Dear Honorable Judge,

My name is Sterlin Luxan. On June 29^th 2010, in your courtroom, I was sentenced to ten years of deferred adjudication for possession of cocaine with intent to deliver (the MDMA charge was dropped and the little cocaine I had stuck. Don't ask me why). I have accomplished a lot since then, and I want to continue improving my situation. But I also want to better myself for the sake of my wife and family. I started the process of self-improvement by entering graduate school for counseling psychology, and working as a freelance writer for the local newspaper. But now that I am trying to obtain a professional license, I have come to an impasse. I must show a licensing committee that I am rehabilitated and that I have the skill and ethical maturity to deserve a license. However, that’s going to prove difficult while I am still on probation. I have spoken with my professor about this situation, and she recommends I get off of supervision as soon as possible. Therefore, your Honor, I write this letter in the interest of my career and livelihood, and I request early termination of deferred adjudication. I have completed all the requirements of my probation, including payment of fees, and I have faithfully abided by all the rules and regulations given to me. Thank you for taking the time to consider this request. My future means everything to me and my family.

Sincerely,

Sterlin Luxan

After a few weeks of tense and anxious waiting, I was informed via a letter that I had earned my freedom. The letter worked. My words loosened me from the clutches of State servitude.

Power and Magic of the Written Word

It is true I had to obey the State and be a good paper prisoner before I was set free. Still, some probationers do not have the ability to compose a proper sentence or letter. They were either underprivileged or felt no need to learn the art of writing. This is unfortunate. It is tragic for anyone who has not honed the skill, especially if they are experiencing dire straits.

I believe it is possible to manifest a destiny by writing with conviction and beauty. Words have the power to augment people's minds. They have the power to embed into the conscious mind and irrevocably alter it.

Terrence McKenna once said that the universe is made of language. It is not made of atoms and energy. It is a mode of communication writ large across reality, and if we can harness its power we can actively create change.

This is why I was able to do by mustering the courage to write the judge, and I just want to remind everyone that they harbor this ability. When all else fails, and things look dismal...do not forget about the pen. Do not forget about the power to effect change by manifesting it through the creation of words. Language is a kind of God. It is our birthright.

“The syntactical nature of reality, the real secret of magic, is that the world is made of words. And if you know the words that the world is made of, you can make of it whatever you wish.”

-Terrence McKenna