I've been having a think. If somebody says something meant to do you damage, what does that really mean? When somebody shows you a sign that they think less of you than they should-can things really end well-what's the breadcrumb trail leading to? I want to know, is action what matters, or does intent supersede it? I know, as a trained writer, words have gravity. If somebody acts alright in ways perceptible to you, but they say things sometimes that are meant to hurt you; if this is a pattern which repeats-then that person surely means a you a bit of harm. So why do we maintain relationships with people who don't mean us well? One of my friends told me that she has no fears in life, because she understands that nothing can happen to her unless she invites it into her experience through the power of her mind-her self trust and self value was sufficient that she believed that she was sort of bulletproof.
I'd not take this seriously had I not experienced her as somebody who lived really well. Her life was an experience of peace, abundance and wellbeing. It hadn't always been-she'd just been forced (through suffering) to work on herself that much. She lived in a manor house with a pretty garden, did pleasant work that didn't feel like work, and just never really had experience of people that didn't work for her unless as a portal to insight to her. She really had peace and I couldn't even imagine how somebody might be moved to say anything to her that was out of line-it'd just seem too ridiculous. It just wasn't in her energy field-she truly valued herself and didn't suffer fools on any level and she considered that your life was a manifestation of your feelings about yourself and your beliefs. She was her garden.
If a partner puts you down, does not respect you, thinks he/she can do better than you (has desire for other people than you that they would like to act on), then by definition, this cannot be a partnership. You are already separated. You know real insight and wisdom can come from unexpected places-but did you know, even TOWIE-not even kidding, I'll tell you what I heard and you'll believe me. Girl 1 said to girl 2: 'Once the respect has gone out of relationship-it doesn't come back (it's finished).' I wonder if, for me at least, some things shouldn't be demonstrated as forgiven in the physical enough to enable repetition (sure, forgiven the spiritual-for you-where you send it away with a blessing and let go) because these things are a true demonstration of what that person feels towards us.
And I think words are our markers of how somebody truly feels. Of course feelings are mercurial- it’s tricky, isn’t it. Dichotomous thinking is a bit dangerous- I’m aware of this. I do think though, feelings leak out in unexpected ways sometimes so it becomes necessary to pay attention to the typos-the accidents because, in my experience, there really don't seem to be many accidents at all.
I've had times of feeling something -uneasy-a generalised discomfort with respect to a certain individual. I've never yet being wrong about these insights except for not paying attention to this knowing and running for the hills asap. I've always given them the rope to hang themselves with and watched on, helpless with disappointment as they did it. If somebody doesn't care if they lose you, if they don't care how much they hurt you, if they want to be with somebody else even if they haven't been, then I recn they've already gone. And it seems, they always tell you. There are no surprises. If you thought everything was ok and they suddenly just went and left you-they will have left a breadcrumb trail you will notice when you look back. (Notice how Hansel looks the other way - away from the breadcrumb trail in the picture). A psychologist I was listening to said that a way to facilitate distinguishing when somebody was lying was to remove the visual, which distracts from the word communication. Text is tricky because it's an incomplete communication -free from distractions of inflection-I think bare text can be a portal into real meaning. In witchcraft, words are healing or hexes: magic spells-powerful enough to change the whole direction of destiny. The words are a marker of intent. Maybe we know the truth from our feelings. Maybe the words are just the breadcrumb trail leading to confirmation of that truth.
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