A long time ago, there was a painter who wanted to paint a picture that everyone liked. It took him a whole year to finally paint a piece of his ideal work. He took the painting to the market with confidence to show it, and put a paintbrush next to the painting, and added a note: "My friend, if you think there is something wrong with this painting, please enlighten me. And make a mark on the painting."
At night, after the painter retrieved the painting, he found that the entire painting was marked with marks. The painter was extremely disappointed. He thought: "There is no one painting without being blamed..." At this time, his wife walked to his side and gave him an idea: "You can draw another painting that is exactly the same and put it in the collection. Go to the market, but this time, you ask every viewer to mark his favorite pen, and it’s not too late to look at it again."
The painter listened to his wife's suggestion, and the result was the same as last time. The whole picture was still filled with marks. The difference is that all the strokes that were once accused are now replaced by marks of praise.
This result made the painter sigh: "No matter what we do or how we do it, it is impossible for everyone to be satisfied. Because, in the eyes of some people, it is ugly, but in the eyes of others, it is just beautiful. If people live in the world, it is enough to satisfy some people!"
This is indeed the case. In this world, everyone has their own independent thoughts and will treat the world according to their own thoughts and preferences. We cannot satisfy everyone. Therefore, when dealing with people, we should have our own principles and bottom line, and learn to refuse, and should not easily change our persistence with the illusion of "satisfying everyone". There was such a story:
Once upon a time, grandpa took his grandson to the market and bought a little donkey. On the way home, the grandson said to his grandpa: "Grandpa, your legs are not good, you are riding a donkey, and I will follow!" Grandpa heard this and was moved to praise his grandson for his filial piety.
After walking for a while, the grandfather and grandson met a group of women. The women unceremoniously accused the grandfather who was riding on the donkey, saying that he didn't care about the children, and it was unreasonable for the adults to ride the donkey to let the children walk.
Grandpa felt reasonable, so he immediately got down, let his grandson ride a donkey and walk behind by himself. After walking for a while, the grandfather and grandson met a group of elderly people. Looking at the grandfather who was limping and walking behind his grandson, the old people pointed to the child's nose angrily and cursed: "This kid is really unfilial! He rides a donkey at a young age to let the old man walk!" The grandson felt like he heard this. It makes sense, just ask Grandpa to come up and ride together. The two walked for a while, and they met a group of donkey owners.
The donkey owner pointed to his grandson and grandson with a disdainful face and said: "Such a small donkey, even if two people are riding, have never seen such a cruel person! This donkey will definitely be exhausted!" The two listened, think about it, and both of them came down and led the donkey.
On the way, I met a group of young people. The young man pointed at them and said wittily: "You two fools, it's a joke if you have a donkey but don't ride!" The grandfather and grandson felt that it made sense.
However, they didn't know what to do: Grandpa riding a donkey was blamed, grandson riding a donkey was blamed, both riding a donkey were criticized, and neither riding nor both of them was making fun. In the end they had to carry the donkey away. As a result, when passing a single-plank bridge, two people accidentally fell the donkey into the mountain stream and fell to death.
The grandfather and grandson may think that the accusations and suggestions of passers-by were all good intentions, so they didn't know how to refuse. Unexpectedly, they ended up with such a result. Some people always like to follow the opinions of others when dealing with others and change their way of doing things when they hear an opinion.
He does what others suggest, hoping to achieve the result of "satisfying everyone", but often backfires, and the final result is likely to be that everyone has opinions and no one is satisfied.
In real life and work, you may often encounter such things. When you do a good thing to attract the attention of colleagues around you, you will hear all sorts of different comments. Zhang San said that you did a great job and selfless; Li Si said that you were ambitious and thought to go up; the boss praised you for being loving and worthy of praise; the subordinates said that you were ruthless and uncreative...In short, there are all kinds of weird discussions. Some are like flying catkins, and some are like sharp swords. How to deal with it? The best way is to adopt the attitude of "change if there is, and encourage if not", without explaining to everyone, don't be constrained by other people's comments, and don't need to be bored by others' words And confused. You just have to remember this, you are you, and only you are your own master.
If you cannot learn to refuse, especially some unreasonable opinions and suggestions of others, you will waste a lot of time on the people and things you hate, and you will also lose a lot of fun. Therefore, we must always remind ourselves, do what we should do, and do not blindly follow other people's ideas or listen to other people's opinions. Bravely reject what you should reject, this is the most correct choice.