Result!

Tuesday was a perfect sunny day that I believe can roast plantain (bole). In a small lecture hall meant to house twenty students but is filled with close to fifty students, guys are arguing about Morata and Lukaku by the corner. "Guy no talk that kind thing, Morata and Lukaku na the same" Buchi says almost at the verge of slapping John. "You people should fight na, be killing yourself for Chelsea when you have 15 pages assignment to submit and defend on Thursday " Commy the book worm cuts in from the front of the hall. Everyone laughs and different chatterings continue from different directions about the just concluded vacation.
I go back to reminiscing my short vacation that didn't turn out too well because my transformer decided to get bad and my community people did a very good job by collecting our money and not fixing anything (irony).
In the midst of it all, Jay comes rushing into the class like He was just chased by three hungry lions. It's unusual, He is one of the slowest guys in class."Results have been pasted" he says while struggling to breath.
Tum tum tum!!!
That's supposed to be my heart beating. Now it's more like...
tum tututum tukutum!
Immediately, my mind flashes back to exam. If I knew I should have answered number 4 instead of that yeye 5. I didn't even finish Statistics exam... Is the time ever enough? I shouldn't have read ANCOVA. Even Cartography sef, I wasted my time reading mumu topic that didn't come out.
My mind wanders away trying to remember questions from last two months examination... I'm not concentrating again. Everyone is talking about how many people had As and Fs, tension everywhere. "Did I have an A" Comfort asks Jay that saw the results... Urrrghhhh! "Can this girl have sense for once" I say to myself. Who cares about your grade?
Just in the midst of it all, someone farted. See what tension and anxiety can cause Abi. I guess today is not going to be a good day after all. Chai! Father, I prayed after those exams o, please cover my errors, I hope Dr Etim drank well before he marked my script or Dr Uko's wife made him very happy just when he was on my script... I begin to cover my scripts again with the blood of Jesus. "Marylyn, what are you even saying? You are praying over spilt milk" I said to myself... Mttchewww.
Immediately, I turn to a mathematician; 20+50=70, good. 26... God and man knows this 26 I'm guessing for Climatology is not possible. Okay, I reduced it to 23, Amen. 23+40=63...B. I don't want a B. Abegi it is better than F sha, at all at all, na wetin bad pass. "More than half of the class failed Statistics, that man do us strong thing o" Jay sadly says. "God if I have D, I will give Thanksgiving in church" Buchi cuts in quickly forgetting about his Morata and Lukaku saga. Still lost in thoughts, I remembered the guy that fainted when he checked his MTH111 result. "I can not come and go and kill myself o, I tried my best mbok" I hear myself say to Bee, one of my closest female friends. Okay, I don't know if I'm encouraging or consoling myself.
We quickly walk to the result building. My heart rate this time around increased to...
Tuhukumgum! tukutum! tukuhumkum!
We eventually get there, the crowd in front of the old board looks very discouraging. "Now I see how crowded hell will be looking at this multitude" I try to crack a joke to lighten up our mood. "My dear, I'm more concerned about my Cartography, leave Heaven and Hell first" Bee replied. Fear written all over her face.
I struggled to the front of the board, and I looked for my registration number. 13/SS/GP/***.
I smiled...