How to hide a secret.

How long can you hide a secret for?
Well for me, my medical life was a secret that I hid in plain sight.
Here you have this boy, going to school everyday.
Getting rushed to the hospital sometimes two times a week to get home around 6-7pm.
Instead of me doing homework.
I just wanted to have more fun and watched TV.
Or went on the Internet trying to download a picture of a naked lady for the whole day on dial up.
And chatting with people on AOL aim chat room.
boyteen13
is what I called myself back then. I was boy in my teen and I was 13.
For years I looked on the internet for data. Some good Some bad.
How do I cure AIDS? Did my research and basically mastered AIDS.
FOMO in the cryptocurrency world means Fear Of Missing Out.
Because of this fear would you think any person would go to any length just to have something.
I believe so to some extent.
So here I am.
Can you see me.
I'm just here alone in front of my computer.
Thoughts pounding my head, some angry some good.
Then depression.
Why cant I figure out a cure.
Why am I so lonely.
Why did you have to donate your tainted blood.
To hate gay people for the longest.
But they didn't do anything.
So I changed.
Theres a beautiful girl.
Is she looking at me.
How do I tell he I like her.
How do I tell her I have AIDS.
Run Away and hide for five years
In those seven years I stop taking my medication in high school.
How can I live if I cant find someone to love me.
Depression. pain. loneliness. doubt.
my life is gone. wasting. dying. sacrifice.darkness. nothing.
I still want to live even if I'm sick.
I had 12 tcells and about 60k VL. and hep C that was never detected
took me years to get to 200 tcells.
about 4 years has past and I got cancer
Im cured
Then I tried to cure hep C and fail
Years passed Harvoni came out.
I'm cured.
Would you like to be in a clinical trial
we would extract your stem cells
genetically modify the stem cells
by programing a lenti virus to Block the virus, and Slow the virus reproduction rate, and making the virus weaker.
failed
I'm lost, lonely still. never had a relationship. where do I go from here.