Whether your scars are mental, emotional or physical, they each tell a story of strength and perseverance.
"But I don't feel very strong," you may say.
"Is your heart still beating?"
"Yes."
"Then you're the strongest person alive right now, and that is definitely something to smile about."
We all have times when we just want to give up; to numb ourselves from the pain, and it's ok to do so for a short time in order to recharge, but then we need to take a deep breath and feel again. Because if we don't feel the contrast of something negative, we tend to take the positive for granted. It's alright to acknowledge the negative, learn from it what you need, and then focus your attention on something that makes you smile. In fact, just smiling for no reason lifts your mood! :D
Certain challenges are harder for some to overcome, and you may think that yours pale in comparison compared to what other people are going through, but I'll tell you this - if it's effecting your mental, emotional or physical health in any way, then it IS important.
Comparing yourself with others will only make you feel worse unnecessarily, because you are YOU, and that is the most important thing to be proud of! You are who you are, scars, freckles, stories and all, so why waste your time wondering "what if" or "if only"? If you have time to ask those questions, then you have time to do something to make your present moment a happier one. Forget the past and the future; just focus on being happy and grateful in this present moment.
I do this whenever I feel the negative momentum taking over and I start feeling better :D
"That's easy for you to say," you mutter, unconvinced.
"It took practice for me to get into the habit, and I'm still learning. There's always something new to learn if we open ourselves up to it."
"But these scars...how can another person love me with these?"
"Because you are worthy of love no matter your scars. They don't define you. They are stories and experiences, ones that made you the beautiful, strong person you are today, and you deserve a love who sees your scars for what they are - beauty marks of survival."
"How can I find someone like that when we live in a world where beauty is physical perfection?"
"Simply by ignoring the magazines and being true to yourself. We create our own worth. YOUR worth doesn't come from what others think is 'perfect' because there's no such thing. We're not here to be perfect. We're here to learn, to grow, to experience - to remember that we are limitless beings capable of creating magic."
"Magic? In this world?"
"Magic can be anything from a sense of wonder, to a sunset or sunrise, to a flower in bloom, a rainbow, cuddling with your cat or dog, or simply seeing 2 birds playing in the sky. Magic is everywhere once you know how to spot it, and once you can, you'll be able to create the emotion with your thoughts alone."
"How can we focus on the magic when confusion, anxiety and feeling lost bombard us from every angle? Especially when family and friends remind us of our flaws every chance they get..."
"By ignoring the negative opinions and speaking with someone who has your best interests at heart, whether it's a compassionate therapist or counsellor, hypnotherapist to discover the root cause and release it, or an empatheic friend. There's always someone out there who can help you."
"How could you understand what other people go through though?"
"I can't, no one can, because each person's experience is entirely personal based on their perception of it. It is impossible for someone to understand completely what another has gone through as we have not lived their life nor experienced it the exact way they did. All we can do is lend a compassionate and empathetic ear, and let them know that life will get better when they are ready for it to."
"What has any of this go to do with scars being beauty marks?"
"Scars show the strength you had for surviving in a world that tried to break you, and that, my darling, is one of the most beautiful things in the world."
This is a conversation I've had with myself (several times) after my heart surgery in June last year (2016), and even after my spinal fusion 10 years ago. I've got a few physical scars, and even emotional and mental, just like pretty much everyone, but I focus on the positive and continue working on myself inside and out to become the best version of myself which changes from day to day. The most important lesson I've learned - and am still learning - is that my self-worth does not come from other people's opinions. It isn't other people's job to make me feel beautiful. It's all personal responsibility.
I AM beautiful in my own way, and it took a LONG time for me to recognise my own beauty beyond the scars, but seeing them as beauty marks changed my perception and now I look at them as such. They add to my life story and have NOTHING to do with my self-worth whatsoever :)
I hope this post helped even just one person understand that scars are beauty marks and they don't define us or the love in our hearts.
Keep shining you beautiful, magical souls, and please don't ever let other people dim your light or make you feel like you don't deserve love or abundance, because you DO deserve it!
Peace out :D <3
PS: All the images here are from Google Images that I found by searching "Abraham Hicks self worth" <3