That abstains from the senses

in senses •  7 years ago 

Idle

I do not want to think, I should not think. A grotesque anxiety bristles my back as my fingers twitch nervously. Writes! Write weón! - It is the voice that abstains from the senses, inside my head. The same as before was telling me how is that I'm a failure because I do not study in college, the same voice that tells me hot stories for hours while I stay lethargic in bed. No, I am not transferring the blame to some metaphysical entity, it is a simple act of splitting. Anyway, it's not that I'm underestimating the reader, but I needed to clarify it for myself. I just shouted, in the background an indiefolk music plays, which makes me think of the Lollapalooza and the young upstart who attends these events. I think of them with disdain. I despise that does not belong to me, it was a connection, such an automatic association, I blame the prejudices of my social class, personally I do not give a shit. Rich and poor, they are all human beings and according to my unattainable morality we should all rot in hell, or wither, or drown, or burn! What I know is hell is Hahaha!

And that's right, create this blog for some time now product of envy - If I'm full of rage. I'm not going to go into detail because I'm a fucking coward and I'm afraid of confrontation. I had thought about preparing this better, I was writing several poems that I never finished. I hate poems, I find them pedantic, later I remember Pessoa and I get more angry. Then I remember the women who told me "Oh, let yourself go" and it makes me more angry. Then I remember that in my childhood I went up to the roof of my house to write poems at dusk and it makes me more angry! Now I'm crying, that last memory was something painful. I'm Serene.

I should delve into each topic I mentioned in these brief paragraphs, dissect them, analyze them, coagulate them and put them to cook at low flame, give them to eat a vagabond animal, study their post-deglutition behavior. At first reading I see so many wounds in these two paragraphs, I just wanted to make a decent entry and go out with this. Obviously reader, you do not understand anything. You are correct reader, neither are you. If elle, I include you, I include you.

The next entry will be an analysis of the first entry.

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