Sex: 5 awkward questions that women do not dare to ask

We asked these questions about sex so you do not have to.

1. There is a wet spot on the bed after sex ... and she is on my side. Is that what I believe?

Does it smell like urine? If so, you have your answer. There is often a little fluid left in the bladder, even after the woman has gone to the bathroom, says Lauren Streicher, MD, professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Feinberg School of Medicine at Northwestern University. . Some sexual positions - such as the missionary - can exert sufficient pressure on the bladder to cause a leak. If this only happens from time to time, there is no need to worry. If the liquid has no smell or a musky smell and you are going to have your period, then, according to Streicher, you may have ejaculated (it happens well in Sex and the Cityso why not you?) "But if you have regular urine loss, it could be a sign of incontinence," says Streicher. She then advises to strengthen your pelvic muscles with "Kegels" (these machines really work!) And to consider talking with your gynecologist or a physiotherapist specializing in women's health.

2. Why do I sometimes laugh or cry uncontrollably during love?

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"Sex is a neurological and emotional act," says Debby Herbenick, a researcher at Indiana University's Center for Sexual Health Promotion and author of the book Sex Made Easy . In other words, it's an intense moment and being exposed (in every sense of the word) to someone can cause unexpected feelings. An emotional reaction may also be due to hormones, depending on where you are in your menstrual cycle or fears you have about this relationship. It is you who know you best: if you feel that something is wrong, think about talking to your partner or a therapist.

3. I'm far from menopause, but in the southern hemisphere, it's as dry as the Sahara - even when I'm in the mood. Why ?

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There are many factors involved in the natural lubrication of the vagina, but anything that disrupts your level of hormones or blood flow in your body can dry you up, says Streicher, who is working on a book about sexual health. She adds that about 5% of women taking oral contraceptives experience vaginal dryness - and yet some gynecologists do not make the connection. Among the leaders who have nothing to do with age, there are also antihistamines, breastfeeding, chemotherapy, in vitro fertilization and diabetes. An easy solution: Streicher recommends applying a good silicone-based lubricant before sex.

4. Should I be concerned if I bleed after having sex?

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If the blood has a light color and it has only happened once (especially after intense lovemaking), it's probably just the result of irritation or rubbing, says Streicher. But if it happens again or there is a good amount of blood, then you should make an appointment with your gynecologist. This could come from the cervix or be caused by an infection such as chlamydia or gonorrhea.

5. About this, um, aquatic smell ...

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A little scientific lesson offered by Dr. Streicher: the normal pH of a vagina is between 3.5 and 4.5, which creates the best conditions for good bacteria to develop. But if the pH rises too much, these good bacteria can not survive, which allows the bad bacteria to take over, leading to the smell of fish not very glamorous and infections such as bacterial vaginosis. Usually, sperm is found to have a high pH, around 7.4. "So if your pH level is already high or you have a lot of sex, introducing high pH sperm can get you over that limit," says Streicher. Your periods can also increase your pH level. Streicher sometimes prescribes vaginal gel called Rephresh, over-the-counter, to help you maintain balance and also recommend taking vaginal probiotics (which are not the same as those for the intestines). And if the bouquet you're talking about smells like bleach or chlorine, according to Streicher: "Well, it's just sperm."

Remember that you should always consult your doctor for appropriate advice and treatment before starting any treatment.