Care and Feeding of Your Steemy Goose

in steem •  8 years ago  (edited)

While it may be true that there is some topics that people seem to get away with posting an interminable series of variants, the Makeup Tutorials, and now Latte Art, in general Steem rewards novelty, humour and generally epic and cool things.

Generating new and engaging material is a constant battle, but you gotta be nice to the Steemy Goose or she can't bake your SteemEggs for you.


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The 10 Steemandments

1. Sleep

The goose cannot be kept up all night. Her Egg-Makers need time to repair and accumulate the SteemNutrients that she needs to make SteemEggs for you. There is no hard and fast rule about when to give it to her, though routines can be helpful for some.

2. Eat

SteemEggs are made of special stuff that you can only get from eating a good diet. Mainly grease, vitamins and minerals, especially those rich in Steemium.

3. Exercise

The Steemy Goose's EggMakers will get jammed up with superoxidants and other nasty Antisteem Acid-Forming Metabolites. You should take her for a good long walk, at least 2-3 times a week. There is no pump for the Garbage Collector system, you have to jiggle everything up a lot to get the trash collected.

4. Clean

A dirty Goose in a messy enclosure does not make good SteemEggs. Give her access to a nice Steemy shower or bath on a regular basis, and tidy up her enclosure so her SteemWorkflow is smooth and organised.

5. Meditate

Maybe sometimes it seems the Goose is sleepy, and can't get the EggMakers to start building a new SteemEgg for you. But she isn't tired, hungry, full of AntiSteem, or dirty and in a dirty enclosure, because you obeyed the first 4 Steemandments. Sometimes she just needs to be alone in a dark and quiet place for a while, without her face glued to a computer screen. When this happens, within an hour usually she is jumping up and cannot wait to sit on her nest and start laying and squeeking her excitement.

6. Pray

You might not be religious, but that's okay, because you don't have to have deep philosophical models to explain this one. The Steem comes from the other part of your mind that sits just below the surface of your conscious attention, ahem I mean the Steemy Goose, of course. It likes to be talked to, out loud, and it likes to be asked for new Eggs, humbly and graciously, and she likes to be thanked for her past SteemEggs. The Steemy Goose loves to give you SteemEggs, but you must both ask for them and be grateful for the ones she already gave you.

7. Socialise

The Steemy Goose is not an island. She needs to be socialised, and you should regularly take her to play with other Steem Geese to chat, comment, follow and generally be convivial and stimulated. She will often then show you things from her SteemPeers that you can use to feed her so she makes a good, Original new SteemEgg for you.

8. Relax

You might be on the brink of bankruptcy, and have debts weighing on your shoulders that make you neglect your Steemy Goose. Some of these you can just declare yourself bankrupt, but for what you cannot, you must not also become uptight about and burden yourself with worry. This is also why you should pray. The Steemy Goose loves you, and wants to give you always better and better SteemEggs, and she can do it for you. But though you may feel a sense of urgency, there is always enough time and space for you and her to succeed.

9. Party

Though it can be taxing upon her EggMakers, it can be good to feed her things that alter her Steemetabolism and cause her brain to be different. You have to be judicious with this, because it can lead to SteemSlumps. The hastening of Steemogenesis sometimes comes at the cost of a dramatic reduction of SteemProduction capacity for a time.

10. Evangelism

You should spend some time on getting others to discover their own Steemy Goose, and get into the SteemLaying business. More Steem Geese, Enclosures and more SteemEggs means a bigger Market Cap for everyone, and more opportunities for Socialising as well. Some people don't necessarily want to work their own Steemy Goose, but rather, would like to renovate your SteemEnclosure and SteemFacilities to increase your Steem Goose's productivity. To find these SteemAngels, you need to pray for them, and to advertise in other places where Steem is unknown and maybe misunderstood.

Happy Steeming and Good Luck!



We can't stop here! This is Whale country!

Loki was born in Australia, now lives in Sofia, Bulgaria. IT generalist, physics theorist, futurist and cyber-agorist. Loki's life mission is to establish a secure, distributed layer atop the internet, and enable space migration.

I'm a thoughtocaster, a conundrummer in a band called Life Puzzler. I've flipped more lids than a monkey in a soup kitchen, of the mind. - Xavier, Renegade Angel

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(All images in the above post are either original from me, or taken from Google Image Search, filtered for the right of reuse and modification, and either hotlinked directly, or altered by me)

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Thanks for the tips, and with that i am off to bed :)

Love it!

Does the Steemy Goose have a name? Does it live in the Steemian Empire? Can it even FLY?!! :P

It's a goose :) so, it can jump down but not really jump up. Plus, when they are socialising they are very protective, let everyone know there is foxes around, and have a vicious bite.

I think it would ruin the fun to be too explicit about the Goose's name... I'll leave that to the imagination and psychoanalysts.

Thanks. Needed that! My husband tells me I drive myself too hard, give myself no breaks, and that I have forgotten to relax. It's always good to be reminded to breath and to ask God for inspiration.

Very cute! And true. We do NEED a break :)