Negative motivations are unproductive, but they are so difficult to eliminate...

I am in a particular situation at the moment, where I know that I have to keep running, trying to find ways to bring enough money in to continue to stay fed and housed. Fortunately, I do know that within the next two weeks, I have money coming in that will put Doomsday another month back. But I am in a holding pattern right now, because I need to really pull together quite a substantial amount of money, in order to enable me to make more money.

I can't just go and get a job, because of this uncertainty, and the necessary 1 month delay before I would get my first paycheck, and especially being that currently the main income is coming from me exactly being able to spend my time on here, reading and posting, that given this particular scenario, I would run out of money before my job paid me, and then how am I going to get to work, and not be intensely distracted by the fact I haven't got any lunch, and there won't be dinner, and I already didn't have breakfast. This is not conducive to a work mindset...

This fear of running out of what I need to keep going, is a curse. Yes, of course I want to make money. Of course I want to. This is not the issue. The issue is this thought weighing on me, that if I don't act, I may have to suffer in the near future. I am suffering to some extent right now, because I have to keep a very close eye on what I've got and how long it will be until I have got more to work with.

If I could just flip my mindset around, and exorcise this sense of the Devil at my back, whipping me along...

See, in the fog of the future, the blurry, obscured shapes of the future what you can pursue, instead of looking backwards through the blurry lens of emotion at the past. This is what I am trying to push my mind into. It is hard, but negative emotions dampen creativity, and reduce motivation. Running from something raises your blood pressure, ruins your appetite, and eventually, makes you sick, physically. I mean, not physically running, but psychologically.

Writing this article is therapy for me to help me galvanise my thinking so that I can act upon it. Perhaps I shall tag this #steemtherapy... A catchy tag that could become interesting in itself if other people were to use it to share the ways that Steem is helping them make positive changes in their lives.